


it's you

by n_kei



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Christmas, M/M, Romantic Comedy, Secret Santa, end of the year
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-09-15 09:24:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 23,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16930635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/n_kei/pseuds/n_kei
Summary: There are some tough lessons in life like time is precious, people change, and some things will only happen once then never again. But between them are small breaths of comfort like a day is a day, and love is love. And this love? It belongs to you.





	1. a day is a day

**Author's Note:**

> story inspired by secret santa by michelerene  
> title from sam kim's song with the same name
> 
> Hey there :) Since it's nearing the end of the year, I’d like to start by taking a bit of time to share my gratitude for the few readers-turned-friends in the handful of months that I’ve been a writer on AO3:  
>  **rusty** \- thank you for sending me the best SVT and NCT care package, the poster is permanently pasted on my wall and my phone case now proudly showcases my caratzen identification <3  
>  **yura** \- thank you for being a great sounding board for all of my half-baked fic ideas. Your energy, honesty and empathy always brought a smile to my face, and your input the reason everyone gets to read more by me <3  
>  **jel** \- thank you for being such a bright, happy person, and for being there for me when I need to rant. You bring the much-needed perspective when I get too enthralled in problems, and my sanity is better because of you <3  
>  **marvelmari** e - our interactions may be brief, but impactful and enjoyable. I love your mind, your experiences, your words, and I will not stop sending you nct gifs and virtual hugs, you’ve been warned  
>  **KpopontheDL** \- I never expected anyone reach out to beta for me, so thank you a million times over. I’ve learned so much from you, and hope my writing continues to be something you enjoy :)  
>  **To all of my readers** \- you’ve made the last 14 months an absolute joy. Thank you for being so understanding of my schedule, for patiently waiting, and for leaving the sweetest comments ever. I’ve always said this, I have the best readers. You guys rock <3
> 
> Without further ado, the feature presentation:

The office is dark save for a few desk lights dotting the quiet atmosphere with warm yellow. The building heater kicks in, a low hum punctuated by random creaks and groans, as if the building itself is wrapping up for the night.

Jaehyun stretches his arms above his head, grunting when he feels a satisfying pop from where shoulder meets clavicle.

One glance at the time on his computer, then to the light from underneath the door to his right, and a feeling of exasperation combined with bone-piercing weariness overcomes his senses. It's not the first overtime this month (which had only just begun) and it certainly won't be the last.

His hand instinctively reaches for the phone on his desk, the little red button a lovely convenience, one he uses daily to connect to the man behind the door: Lee Taeyong.

•••

There’s a saying that goes something like ‘Better to be busy than have nothing to do’. But what no one talks about are the sacrifices made for that taste of bubble reputation, and the health concerns of curled spines, dried eyes, tense brains that have shrivelled with overuse. It's better to be busy so you can enjoy life later. Unless you work yourself to death, then there is no life left to enjoy.

It is the teaching from his grandmother, a sweet, brittle woman who lived long years working and working, first to help with her parents, then her own family. Finally, at age sixty eight, with a crooked back and skin on hands tough and unfeeling, settles to enjoy her late years. She was tasked with caring for teenage Jaehyun while his parents worked late hours to pay for the mortgage of their sizable apartment in Seoul.

 _Work hard, play hard, but in moderation,_ she would say, patting his shoulder once firm and fond before settling in front of the television, then clicking into snores moments later.

That was when Jaehyun turned 15, full of youthful exuberance and limbs growing much faster than cuffs of pants and sweaters can stretch. It was a cold February day, and he wanted nothing more than to jump outside wearing the barest (but stylish) minimum to catch the latest Marvel movie with his friends. Moderation was overrated. Even still, he wore her knitted vest under the shrinking hoodie, tugging the sleeves over his hands and hastily snatching the matching wool hat from his bed before leaping out the door.

He'd spend all of his money treating everyone for dinner- an old Korean tradition- watched Avengers, and got his ass kicked playing Starcraft in the neighbourhood internet cafe. He didn't get home until four in the morning, fingers numb and calloused and only two thousand won left in his slim wallet.

Next morning, his grandmother found him halfway crawled into his bedding, tsked, and dropped a heavy backpack on his face before shuffling away. His breakfast was cut by a third, leaving him with less soup, rice, and salted fish to combat the winter morning chills, which he swore was the reason his fingers and toes threatened to freeze off on the walk to school.

His parents reprimanded the gaming bit and yeah, he admitted, he went a little over. But one look from grandma had his guilt running rampant across his cheeks. It’s not her anger, but the message she was trying to convey: _everything_ _in moderation, you have a long life ahead of you_.

He got the message eventually, and studied like hell for the last two months of school, which landed him in the top 10 of his graduating year.

Later, she dropped a heavy backpack to wake him up again, but it missed by a whole inch. There was more rice, soup, and fish for breakfast;  Jaehyun thought he could get used to this.

The tradition continued for the next two years where he learned moderation (within the confines of working and playing hard, of course) and grew even taller, filled out in places he’d never noticed, and realized he’d have to bend really low to properly, politely bow to his grandmother.

He was 22, a fresh-faced graduate from Seoul University’s well known business program when he decided to keep going as in- work part time as a barista to pay for his Master’s for Business Communication. His parents were against it at first, it’s another three years of school, but he was determined to start his career on the right foot. Plus, any kind of work experience related to business would sound good on paper; it was just a matter of word-smithing in the end.

So he did that for about half a year, through which the café owner liked him so much he got bumped into a manager role. Higher pay, more responsibilities, a shinier line of text on his resume. Then he continued that for another half a year before calling quits. It was one thing to work full time and study for his masters, another altogether to continue for the remaining two years.

After that, he found a part time job as a census caller for the government, asking if the madam or mister had the time to answer a few questions. Consequently, he grew a thick skin from all the times he was hung up on, and the handful of times he was cussed out for being the annoying fuck who had nothing better to do with his life.

He also learned that he had a really nice voice from a lonely widower, whose husband had left the world from lung cancer. He was reasonably flustered and blushed while stuttering out the textbook _Have a good rest of your evening, sir,_ the sly chuckling echoes in his ears as he pressed the END CALL button.

At 25, he proudly showed off his shiny diplomas and job contract to his grandmother, whose age became more visible, but still had the spark of fire in her eyes when she beckoned him closer only to pinch his plump cheek with a surprisingly strong grip. She hadn’t done that in years. Then she patted solidly on his shoulder, the motion spoke volumes of the pride and happiness she had for him, and sent him off to fetch the morning newspaper. It was Saturday and there was a whole section of comics she needed to catch up on.

He laughed, dimples and all, and told her that patience was a virtue.

She tsk-ed, like all those years ago, and said she was too old for patience.

And like all those years ago, he didn’t get it at first. Then it became a sobering memory when she was admitted to the hospital a few weeks later.

Liposarcoma, a rare cancer that develops in the connective tissues… all around the body. It was discovered early and treatment was expensive and not always effective. The nurse delivered the news with eyes downcast, tone impersonal, professional, apologetic.

Jaehyun didn’t want to hear that. _He didn’t want any of it._

He punched a wall, ran until his legs gave, and heaved and sobbed until his voice was hoarse, eyes empty, and heart heavier than ever before.

Work. Work had always made his grandmother happy.

So he threw himself into his new job, an account manager (which he later realized was synonymous to the term right hand man) for the production company CEO with a household face and name: Lee Taeyong.

 

Taeyong is the second child of name well known business moguls in Seoul, one running a small but successful entertainment company, the other a broadcasting company. Their first child, a daughter, succeeded them to become a lawyer, practicing in a well-known firm in the heart of Gangnam. No strings pulled, she paved her own path with steel intelligence and a steelier backbone.

Then there was Taeyong, whose marketable appearance was all anyone could talk about for days and days when he was only 4. Unlike his sister, he delved right into media arts and soaked up every anecdote accounted at the dinner table, every visit to the filming sites, every camera, lights, action. He had his fingers in every pie possible and the list of commercials he participated in before the age of seventeen was longer than his arm.

He had large, expressive, impossibly dark eyes, an angular jaw, strong nose, pink, plump lips and fair skin. He was attractive and he knew it. He also loved and hated it, with the latter winning as a surge of annoyance and anger came in the form of one too many security breaches at his family's gated apartment. So after he graduated from high school, instead of continuing his career in front of the camera as the media speculated, he moved to the back.

And it wasn't just any back, but all the way to his parent's roots: business.

Like anything else in life, he tackled this new direction with maniacal passion and precision, graduating first in his class. When the word spread, job offers came flying in left, right and centre, with the top two folders reflecting his name in shiny, golden letters signed by his father and mother, separate.

His father hopes that he’ll take over the entertainment company, his mother the broadcasting company, so he sat his over-achieving ass somewhere in the middle and built his own production company from the bottom up, using all of his knowledge and connections, accepting minimal financial help from his parents. And that was how LTY Co., the newest production company tied the beautiful bow around the three practices: entertainment, broadcast, and production. His parents let out a soft but weighted sigh of relief.

Balance restored.

His sister warned him about getting into the family business, about the late nights and being married to his work, about sacrifices that almost tore the family apart on several occasions growing up, as if he'd forgotten.

What she wasn't aware was his inclination for men, which meant that what he wanted for his life was not exactly the norm. It meant that he couldn't be in the limelight with the boy he saw in secret, the same boy his mother walked in on during a heated making out session but instead of the outrage he predicted, she laughed and screamed, “I knew it!” before slamming the door behind her...

He and the boy eventually broke it off because he couldn't come to light with it, and the boy grew impatient and frustrated. He was understandably devastated and took matters to his own hands, but slowly.

In the end, with the coming out talk over and done with, his father and sister accepted him with stiff but understanding nods while his mother held his hands in support. He knew he couldn't possibly let this be public knowledge without throwing the paparazzi in for the story of the year, and giving his investors a reason to stop the funds.

What he didn’t account for was the social climate to shift into something looser, something more understanding and accepting in the recent year or two. He became one of the first CEOs under 30 to publicly come out. He thought the proclamation would affect his work, and it did, but his reputation preceded who he wanted to fuck and it became business as usual again after a few months.

He was insanely thankful that the backlash was minimized, and his company managed as well as it did. But it also meant that he wasn't thinking about family, wasn't thinking about dating, work was his everything. It gave him every validation, every economic stability, every moment of happiness, and he took it to heart, never for granted, and worked even harder.

(He admitted this in the private company of his business partner and CFO of the company, Yuta, the product/design manager and Taeyong’s oldest friend, Johnny, and Jaehyun, who felt like an outsider, but too worried to leave a visibly emotional Taeyong alone.)

It was that same passion and intensity that made Jaehyun fall in love with the man three years ago.

 

In the three years, he discovers more sides to Taeyong than he'd ever expect to learn about when he first signed his name on the dotted line of the job offer.

When a client contract falls through and it's on them, Taeyong would tuck his head close to the laptop screen and scan through every word, every character for any mistakes, fix them, so the next meeting will yield better results.

When a client conveniently forgets to pay a year after the invoice, the fire in Taeyong's eyes would spell a slow and agonizing death as he sends a strongly-worded email asking for the money, sandwiched between the threat of getting sued and Cheers, Taeyong, CEO of LTY Co. If it stretches to the following year, the business relationship is terminated and the client is blacklisted by all three companies and their subsidiaries. If word travels fast, and it indeed does with the tabloid-worthy Taeyong (his face too attractive not to be splashed across the front page), the client's reputation would take a beating so hard their bottom lines would not be balanced for as long as their pride prevents them from declaring bankruptcy.

When the client testimonials come through, thanking him and his team for the creative take on solving new challenges, the beautiful and professional work, and accommodating for the tight deadlines (because it's never not), he’d ‘accidentally’ forward the email to Johnny, who would CC everyone else. There’d be an impromptu small dinner at the end of the day, where his small but capable team of 15 are invited to join. Jaehyun would catch the fierce pride and satisfaction tugging at his lips as he sits in the back, nursing a dinky cup of sake with Yuta while the rest of the team throws back beers and complains about work, their clients, their boss, and the weather.

Taeyong would smirk and put the mouthy intern in his place (which was, more often than not, the one and only Jisung). But the empty threat falls on deaf ears when everyone echoes that he'd be too nice to fire him, if he'd even remember about it the next day.

Then came the next day, when Jisung settled at his desk only to notice that everything's displaced, though not missing. He learns that being lightweight does not equate to being a blackout drunk, and that he should complain about Taeyong, but not so loudly. Chenle, the design intern, takes pity on him and helps sort his desk out again. The bubblegum haired boy has always had a knack for finding things like scissors, paper clips, and sticky note hearts.

Finally, there are the quiet moments where Taeyong is stressed beyond imagination, the result of taking on too much because he wants to do everything himself. He would lock himself in his room for 80+ hour weeks, calling and writing and researching and calculating to make sure that his decisions were correct.

In those moments, Jaehyun would stay behind without being asked, silently taking folders from his desk, scan the notes made, and work alongside him until the pile diminishes, project by project.

Taeyong would shoot him a look, quietly thankful as the hard lines of lis lips loosen into a soft smile, and Jaehyun would find himself getting lost in the intense pools of dark brown. He tries really damn hard to not bridge the space between and kiss Taeyong so deep and thoroughly until they're both breathless, and work is the furthest thing from their minds...

He'd bury the notion as quick as it surface, smiling politely back and accepting the ride Taeyong offers, courtesy of his chauffeur Taeil. Then the same thing happened the next evening, then the next, and his own car would be parked in his employee spot for days on end. Finally, he jokingly complained that if Taeyong insisted to give him rides home, he should also offer him rides to work since he can’t take his own car and public transit is agonizingly slow. Taeyong blinks, once in shock, twice to hide the guilt, then a third time to consider the idea, before nodding and saying that could be arranged.

So now they’d often be seen getting to work together, discussing about clients and accounts and jobs before they even get to the office at 8 am sharp.

Taeyong was superman reincarnate. He was constantly working, constantly moving forward, constantly pushing for better and better and better. And Jaehyun wants to be there to support him all the way. Give him everything. Then maybe, just maybe, Taeyong will slow down enough for Jaehyun to catch his fingers, and they will walk, side by side, to anywhere.

 

Which brings his wandering thoughts back to this moment, where his ass starts to hurt from sitting in the most ergonomic office chair, pressing the red button to tell his boss to go the fuck home.

It picks up before it rings.

“What?”

Three years ago, Jaehyun would’ve bit through his tongue to refrain from commenting on his boss’ rudeness.

“Hello to you too, asshole.”

Taeyong lets out a drawn out sigh and he grins to himself.

“It's boss, you mouthy shit.”

“The mouthy shit you need. I’m probably the only person keeping you sane in this company.”

Taeyong snorts. “I sign your pay checks.”

He grins as he tips his chair back, playing with the cuff of his cardigan. “And I've forged your cherry-ass signature while you were out of the country, the days amounting to almost a third of the year-”

“What do you want?” Comes the interruption.

It's a sore spot that Taeyong never really wanted to admit to, but yes, he'd asked Jaehyun for help a _few_ times, but those were under special circumstances. An urgent family situation, needing money earlier than the end of the month, Taeyong understood flexibility. But that's changed since payroll is completely electronic and paperless now.

Jaehyun bites back a smile. “When are you leaving?”

The glide of finger pads on the keyboard pause after a minute, and Taeyong says softly, “I still have some things to do. You should go home first.”

Jaehyun's frown deepens. “I thought those could wait till tomorrow?”

“Change of plans, Kim needs it before the weekend, so I have to check the scope now.”

“Ah. Is there anything I can help with?”

“I can handle it. Just go home.”

The line goes dead before Jaehyun replies, and he glances at the door while slowly placing the receiver down, a twitch developing under his eye.

Let it be known that Taeyong is one of the most stubborn people he’s ever had the pleasure to meet.

He scans his desk to see if there's something else to do when his eyes catch on the white slip of paper poking out from under the stationery holder.

It's the Secret Santa card.

Johnny, ever the enthusiast of western holiday traditions, convinced Taeyong to host a Secret Santa event before the annual Christmas dinner when the company first began six years ago. A small postcard sized slip with a name in the corner, and five lines down the middle, suggestions to help your Secret Santa find gifts for you.

Jaehyun checks his wrist watch, looks at Taeyong's office door one last time, then begrudgingly picks up a black pen and contemplates what he actually wants. Hm. The first is easy:

_Sleeping in_

He smiles sardonically. With the end of the year quickly approaching, everyone is feeling the crunch time. Any amount of extra sleep would be a blessing.

Next:

_Everyone takes lunch away from their desks_

They have a lunch room that isn't also the kitchen. Johnny even got a hand in decorating and designing the space, filled it with plants, a nice painting, and a lot of white space. But it's rarely used because everyone takes lunch at their desk, ploughing through the next project and meeting the next deadline with concentrated frowns permanently etched on their faces.

It would do everyone some good.

He hums, doodling stick figures on the top right corner of the paper and tries to come up with more interesting things. It's not like he'll be submitting this anyway.

_A vacation for my family_

He offered to send them on a vacation before, but they could never find the time- his mother, an opthamologist, would be busy when his father, a professor, would be free. They've gone on weekend trips to Busan and Jeju Island when he was younger, but those were the only times they travelled together.

He smiles as he remembers the brief, happy moments where his parents really let loose and enjoyed themselves at Haeundae, his mother teasing his father's hands from behind his back to link fingers, laugh lines deep and genuine.

Without thinking, he writes the next item on the list-

_A kiss from the boss_

-and pauses, staring at the words like he didn’t know how they got there, but longing for the outcome anyway.

If only.

He sighs, scratching it out and crumpling up the piece of paper and tossing it out just as the door opens and a thin figure emerges from the cave within. Taeyong stills mid-step as he pulls on his jacket, eyes widening like he didn’t expect Jaehyun to be there, then he breaks out of whatever spell, shakes his head and scans the rest of the office.

“Just you?”

Jaehyun nods, but Taeyong isn’t looking at him, so he says, “Yeah.”

Crunch time also meant that sometimes the creative team of designers, animators, producers and directors would stay until the wee hours of the morning. Taeyong would usually order food if his team stayed late- coffee, healthy meals, fruits and other brain food. But on days like today, where he holes up in his office to address tens of tens of emails and call after call, it lands on Jaehyun's shoulders to complete the task (and he did- ordering pizza and energy drinks as per Jisung's request).

Taeyong hums, then turns back to Jaehyun with a small smile.

“Let's go then? Taeil’s waiting downstairs.”

A grin tugs at the corner of Jaehyun’s mouth and he nods, quickly tugging on his jacket. Taeyong gets the lights, and they head down together.

•••

The following Monday, the weather channel reports that a heavy snowstorm will hit Seoul squarely in the face, burying the city with more snow than in the previous 72 years. Jaehyun anticipated this and bought enough food and a generator in case he was snowed in, and a shovel in the event that he needed to dig himself out of the frigid winter hellhole.

He went to sleep thinking about ways to get to work, only to be woken up at 5 am, an hour before his alarm goes off, by a number he does not recognize. He quickly picks it up, a weird mix of anger and concern. “Hey?”

“Good morning, Jaehyun.”

This voice. He squints at the numbers on the screen, then something clicks. “Taeil?”

“Yes! Sorry if I woke you." His apologetic tone effectively douses out the anger for being woken up so early.

“No, it’s fine. How are you?”

“I’m okay, thank you for asking.”

There’s an awkward pause where Taeil shuffles about, but quietly, and Jaehyun almost falls back asleep. He catches himself before his head hits the pillow and clears his throat to sound more awake. “Um, not that I don’t like talking to you, but what is the purpose of this call?”

“Ah, well. Last night, I was informed that you’ll be needing a ride to the office today. Unfortunately, the garage that I park Taeyong’s car is completely snowed in, and cleaning the mess will take a long time, so I won’t be able to get to the car until 10 am earliest.”

Jaehyun’s eyes widen. “Wait, 10 am? That’s like four- wait no, five-”

“Five hours from now, yes.” The amusement is clear in Taeil’s voice.

Jaehyun’s brain quickly recalls if he has any calls this morning, and when it comes out negative, he starts laughing. “Oh my god, this is like a miracle! All this time to sleep- wait. What about Taeyong then?”

The other side of the line goes deathly silent. Then Taeil says in a hesitant, quiet voice, “Actually, I was wondering if you could call him for me, because between the two of us, you’re probably more likely to keep your job after breaking the news.”

…

Well, he’s not wrong. Taeyong is known to be the least agreeable in the mornings before his third cup of coffee. Jaehyun groans into his pillow and rubs a tired hand across his eyes. “You’re sure that you 100% cannot get the car out on time?”

“Yes,”

“And that you’ll be able to get us to work by 10:30 am latest?”

“I shall endeavour to try my hardest.”

Jaehyun sighs. “Alright, I’ll see you at 10 am.”

As soon as he hangs up, he dials number 1 on speed dial (because he’s changed it from his voicemail to Taeyong’s personal number) and presses the green phone button.

It picks up after three rings.

There’s a tired inhale followed by three little, angry words that promise a slow, painful death: “What. The. Fuck.”

Jaehyun almost laughs.

“Who are you and why are you calling me at-” He imagines Taeyong squinting at the phone screen, “5:13 in the goddamn morning?”

Jaehyun clears his throat and says in his most neutral tone, “Hey.”

There is a short pause.

“Jaehyun?”

Taeyong sounds murderous now, imagining his face looks is making Jaehyun grin from ear to ear.

“Rise and shine, boss,” he sing-songs, twisting to his side and pulling the covers higher to keep himself warm.

“The sun isn’t rising for another 2 hours. What the hell are you calling for?”

Jaehyun snorts at the rudeness and pulls his blanket over his head to keep the bed from cooling. “As it were, Taeil called to inform me that the garage you normally park your car is snowed in, and cleaning the mess will take until 10 am. I’d offer a ride, but my car is at the office. So unless you want to take public transit, Taeil will come and pick you up at 10 am.”

It takes a moment, but instead of the sharp reply, Taeyong sounds dazed, “...ah, I see.”

Jaehyun blinks. That’s unexpected. Normally, Taeyong would be feigning aneurysm by now. “You okay there?”

He hears Taeyong clears his throat. “I’m fine.”

 _Huh._ “Do you have any calls or meetings in the morning?”

“I have a call at 9, but I can take it at home.”

“Oh, okay.”

A random shiver goes down Jaehyun’s back. He frowns and shuffles into the blankets, curling his long legs inwards and burying his face into the pillow.

“Where are you? You sound like you’re in a tunnel.”

“Huh? Oh, I’m in bed, under some blankets… it’s cold.”

“...I see.”

Right, because a normal boss would not know what to do with that situation. Jaehyun flushes lightly and has an apology on the tip of his tongue, but before he says, his door opens and his grandmother’s head peeks in. “Are you awake? I heard something-”

Jaehyun sits up quickly, surprised at the intrusion.

Meanwhile, he hears a sharp intake of breath and remembers Taeyong is still on the line.

“You must be busy. I’ll see you in a few hours. Bye.”

“Tae-”

Jaehyun stares at the phone in his hands for a moment. It’s early, he’s hardly awake, but he thought… he swore he heard…

“Was that a work call? This early?” His grandmother asks.

Jaehyun nods distractedly, sparing a crooked smile while dialing Taeyong’s memorized number. “Sorry, I’ll tell you later. I need to make a call.”

His grandmother makes a sound of acknowledgment and shuffles out. The calling tone rings four times, but no one picks up and he gets directed to the voicemail. He growls in frustration and tries again. Still voicemail.

_Fuck._

His fingers hover over the message option. He’s never privately messaged Taeyong before, it’d feel more personal and less professional and he didn’t want Taeyong to think that he wasn’t serious about the job. But…

Making a small sound of frustration, he puts his phone away and leaves his toasty bed to greet his grandmother.

•••

When Taeil pulls into the apartment driveway, the butterflies in Jaehyun’s stomach flutter more rapidly, like struggling to break free. He opens the door and quietly slides in, careful to not bring the snow with him.

The ride is deathly quiet, and Jaehyun is too nervous to start a conversation, especially when Taeyong is looking so preoccupied with something on his phone.

Finally the car slows to a stop, and Jaehyun moves to open the door while sneaking a glance at Taeyong. He's still reading something on his phone, which is not uncommon. But Jaehyun notices how the edge of his jaw tightens imperceptibly, and without thinking, he reaches over. His hand hovers in the space between them, the sudden movement jolts Taeyong from his phone. Taeyong looks at his outstretched hand, then back at him with a question in his eyes.

Jaehyun smiles, crooked and awkward, and pulls his hand back.

Taeyong frowns. “What?”

“It was my grandmother.”

There was a brief flash of confusion in Taeyong’s eyes, before a look of understanding dawns on him. “It’s not my business-”

Jaehyun shakes his head, looking away. “She has cancer, liposarcoma. The doctors- they don’t know how much time she has left, but she's already outlived the expected 9 months. Her condition recently got worse, so I’ve moved back in with my parents because we don’t know when… This might be her last Christmas.”

It feels weird talking to Taeyong about personal matters, but he feels like if he doesn’t say something, the misunderstanding will grow, and he doesn’t want that. He meets Taeyong’s gaze with open eyes, knowing the hurt and sadness will show, but doesn’t look away because he has nothing to hide.

Taeyong stares, pausing a little too long before catching himself. He quickly looks down at his black oxfords, hands clasped on his lap. “I’m sorry to hear that. You didn’t have to explain it to me. It wasn’t in my place to ask.”

This time, Jaehyun doesn’t hesitate to hold Taeyong’s arm in his hand, squeezing lightly despite how his heart thumps in his chest. “It’s okay. I didn’t want any misunderstanding between us.” Taeyong looks like he’s about to argue, but Jaehyun shakes his head firmly. “Please don’t hang up on me again.”

He exits the car quickly and doesn't catch the look of shock on Taeyong's face.

Jaehyun rushes to his desk with an uncharacteristic stormy aura about him, and Johnny is the first to catch on.

“Morning, Jae,” he greets with his signature gentle smile.

_You’re at work, snap out of it._

The air exhales from Jaehyun's lungs, and he manages a small smile and quiet greeting before turning back to his computer. Mark and Donghyuck look over briefly to catch Johnny's confused eyes, both shrugging in unison when he quirks an eyebrow at them.

At a loss, Johnny squeezes his shoulder before moving back to his desk.

When Taeyong emerges from the elevator moments later, Johnny shoots him a pointed look, at Jaehyun, then back. Taeyong's only response is a stiff shake of his head before quickly entering his room and closing the door behind him.

The day goes on as it normally does: filled with client calls, meetings, and intense concentration to getting things done. The only difference is that when Jaehyun returns to his desk after a quick lunch run, there's an innocuous gift on his desk, and he immediately brightens. He makes quick work of the wrapping paper, and smiles at the gadget in his hand.

It's the mini drone from his Secret Santa.

He bounces from his chair, waving the drone around. “Thank you, Secret Santa!”

A few people say you’re welcome, some laugh at his antics, and Jisung gives his signature grunt response to everything that’s ever screamed out in the office (which happens more often than one expects).

Jaehyun takes his seat again, his morning momentarily forgotten, and goes back to work.

It’s not until the end of the day (which is really two hours past regular working hours) when the pile of work has diminished to zero files and all the emails are read and replied accordingly, that Jaehyun finally stands from his desk, stretching his long legs, then making a beeline for the bathroom because he has the habit of holding it in until he finishes all the work.

As he returns to his desk he notices a bigger gift box sitting on the ground a few paces behind his chair. One glance around the office shows that he and Taeyong are the only ones in the office (again), but Taeyong wouldn’t make it that obvious, would he? Or was it there all along and he just didn’t notice it until now?

Curious, he tears open the wrapping to see the best drone model in his hands...

He blinks owlishly at the box, turning it in his hands as his heart speeds up. One of these models can easily go for $1,000 a pop, he would never ask for this. Who–

The door to his right opens, and Taeyong comes out looking tired and overworked, but there’s an uncharacteristic bounce to his steps. He catches Jaehyun’s gaze and raises a finely shaped eyebrow in question.

“What?”

Jaehyun stares. “What do you mean what?”

Taeyong looks at the box in Jaehyun’s hands, then back up. “Is that from your Secret Santa?”

Jaehyun shrugs. “I think so? I got a smaller drone during lunch which I thought was from my Secret Santa, but now this…” He frowns, staring at the box like it holds all of the answers to the universe.

Taeyong snorts softly. “Aren’t you happy you got what you asked for? It looks like some state of the art technology,” he says while eyeing suspiciously at the box.

Jaehyun glances at Taeyong from the corner of his eye to find the cover up, but it comes out blank. He’s normally good at reading Taeyong, but he sounds like he really doesn’t know about the drone, so he’s probably not Jaehyun’s Secret Santa.

“Oh, I’m ecstatic. I’m probably going to try this out tonight. I’ve seen the footage from one of these and they’re gorgeous. Apparently the UX and usability are a whole step up from the older versions, and the video quality and colour match to reality are-”

Taeyong scrunches his nose, and Jaehyun chuckles, scratching the back of his head.

“I've wanted one of these for a very long time.”

“I hadn’t noticed,” comes the sarcastic reply. Taeyong tilts his head to the door. “Need a lift?”

Jaehyun nods with a grateful smile. He quickly collects his things and joins Taeyong by the elevator with the energy of a golden retriever. Between yanking on his jacket, holding onto his two new drone toys and packing up his briefcase, his hair gets messy, and Taeyong tries to point it out on his own hair. “You have this piece of, your hair is-”

Jaehyun stills mid-stride, turning to face Taeyong. “A fluff? Can you get it off?”

Taeyong eyes at him like he’s grown another head. And perhaps he had, perhaps that head is thinking for itself, and deciding that yes, today is the day I will ask my boss to fix my hair. He’s about to call it off but Taeyong steps on his tiptoes, running his hand through the dark brown tresses to fix the misplaced hair.

“It wasn’t a fluff, just mussed up,” Taeyong says in a low mutter. He takes a step back to observe his handy work, the nods, like everything’s in good order again.

Everything but Jaehyun’s poor racing heart.

They meet eyes and Taeyong flashes a small, shy smile. Jaehyun feels like his legs might give at any point.

The elevator pings, and they step on without another word.

•••

The next day, Jaehyun hauls a gigantic box into Taeyong’s car and is met with curious eyes from his boss.

“Do I want to ask?”

“You’ll see.”

He leaves a huge box on a desk, then Taeyong laughs out loud in understanding. (Jaehyun will deny that he stared, but would privately admit that it was a rare and beautiful sight.) When the rest of the office trickle in soon after, he hears the loud squeal echoing down the open-concept office. Johnny has no doubt enjoyed the gigantic 10 ft tall teddy bear (read: new snuggle friend) very much. Jisung and Chenle peer curiously into the box, but Johnny quickly smacks the lids closed, blushing hotly while pushing the complaining boys back. He has a senior reputation to uphold, after all. Jaehyun turns back to his work and grins to himself. Mission accomplished.

A notification reminds him of the weekly team meeting scheduled for 11 am, which is in ten minutes, and he quickens his typing, eager to get the email out before the meeting.

The meeting starts a little after the proposed time, Taeyong had a call with a rather chatty client and messaged the group to start without him, they end up gossiping and catching up until he shows up anyway.

Jaehyun leads the group discussions, catching up with the project managers of incoming work, current projects, and checking for the capacity to take on more work. He also double checks with the overall schedule and working relationships with all designers, animators, directors and producers.

Wendy, a project manager, raises a hand to flag a client for pushing for more work than the contract stipulated, suggesting that a change of scope be discussed as soon as possible. Johnny also follows up on the two updated scopes that were in discussion a few days ago. Jaehyun confirms that those projects are good to be worked on, and will forward him the details as soon as he receives them.

Usually Taeyong would wrap up with an overview of how the company is doing, what’s to come, and give everyone verbal pats on the back. But today, he and Yuta are engaged in a brief chat before Yuta announces that they’ll be taking everyone out to lunch, met by immediate cheering, junior animators Yukhei and Mark being loudest of them all.

Jaehyun raises an eyebrow. This wasn’t discussed. And what about their afternoon call with a client from Hong Kong?

Taeyong must've read the question in his eyes because he pulls Jaehyun back slightly and mutters, “I can leave early to take the call. You can stay and settle the bill with the company card.”

Jaehyun nods with a polite smile.

The others pull on their jackets and follow Yuta down the hallway, and the address is noisily dispersed in the group, everyone buddying up to fit into the least amount of cars. Taeyong takes his car, Yuta and Johnny jump in after him, and Ten, who has attached himself to Johnny's hip, is the last one to squeeze in.

Jaehyun takes his car, a black Hyundai Santa Fe with Sicheng in shotgun and Mark, Yukhei and Donghyuck in the back.

“Almost forgot you drove,” muses Sicheng, buckling in and expertly avoiding the warning look from Jaehyun.

“These seats are co~old,” whines Donghyuck. Mark nods in agreement.

Yukhei lets out a low booming laughter and swings his long arms around- _why was he sitting in the middle?_ \- to pull them in with the force of an excited rhino. “I'll keep you guys warm!”

Mark yelps and attempts to pull back, but he's held steadfastly to Yukhei's side. Donghyuck on the other hand takes the proffered warmth in stride, noodling his arm behind Yukhei to hold Mark in place. Only he misses and ends up poking Mark's side, sending him into a burst of loud giggles. Yukhei gets scared and loosens his grip and Mark climbs away for his life, which is a meager half inch before his leg hits the door. He glares daggers at Donghyuck and loudly reminds everyone within (very close) earshot that he's ticklish so stop this abuse, please and thank you.

With a wry grin (and a circus happening full swing at the backseat) Jaehyun sets off to the address Yuta sent them to. He vaguely remembers it- a ramen restaurant Taeyong brought him to it a few weeks ago, after they signed off a big contract with a broadcasting company from Japan. They were discussing the price for exclusive rights to broadcast a show they’ve worked on with a budding idol group from Taeyong’s father’s entertainment company. They also briefly touched upon any future collaborations between the two, ending on a good note.

The dinner meeting wrapped up earlier than expected and Taeyong, having ate very little from the dinner due to nervousness, suddenly grew ravenous and brought Jaehyun to Dinner Round Two. The ramen was rich and delicious, with a thick cut of cha-siu the signature half-boiled egg. The night ended with Taeyong asking Taeil to drop Jaehyun off first before they go home.

Jaehyun smiles to himself at the memory, and soon, the car pulls into the familiar parking lot.

Lunch is a fun, rambunctious affair. There’s no helping when LTY Co. is full of young people, most of which are men. It’s a bit of a mess, but everyone manages to put in their order (with extra ramen for Jisung, Johnny, Jaehyun and Doyoung) and the conversations start up again. Loudest of all is, unsurprisingly, Yukhei trying to guess who his Secret Santa is. A roar of teases come in when graphic designer Yeri announces she’s jealous of Johnny’s teddy bear, and Wendy reminds her that her gift of an expensive Jo Malone cologne was something she specifically asked for and that she should be grateful for what she got, because that shit was expensive.

The chatter dissolves when the food comes, then various compliments to the chef, food, and deities are paid before everyone digs in.

About half an hour later, Taeyong quietly nods at Jaehyun who is sitting across from him, a silent ask to take care of the bill (and the kids), and slips out and back to work. Jaehyun smiles back, ndding once before returning to the conversation with Doyoung and Sicheng about why genetically modified humans are not a good idea.

It’s only when everyone makes their way back to the office, with full bellies and satisfied grins, that Jaehyun realizes not a single word was uttered about work during lunch, not even one complaint. His grin widens, and he goes back to his desk, intent to get as much done as he can.

 

At the end of the day as everyone’s wrapping up, Jaehyun knocks briskly on Taeyong’s door, hears a soft sound of acknowledgment, and strides in with an arm full of documents. Yuta is sitting on the desk while Taeyong glares at him defiantly for a quick, conflicting moment, before turning to flash Jaehyun a tight smile.

“Done for the day?” He asks.

Jaehyun nods slowly. “You tell me. Do you need help with anything else?”

He eyes the small pile of folders on Taeyong’s desk with interest, but Taeyong shakes his head firmly. “It’s alright, don’t worry about those. You’re free to go.”

Surprised, Jaehyun turns his gaze to Taeyong and sees tension to the corners of his eyes. He then looks at Yuta, who wears a wide, disarming smile.

“Um. Are you sure? I don’t mind staying back, I’ve got n-”

“It’s fine. Yuta offered help me with these tomorrow morning so I should be okay. I’ll be leaving soon too.”

Hearing the firm dismissal that brooks no argument, Jaehyun smiles politely, turns heels, and closes the door behind him.

He takes a deep breath and hears soft murmuring from behind the doors.

They’re business partners and Yuta is Taeyong’s second oldest friend (arguably closer than he and Johnny are), they’re bound to talk about the company’s future growth, projections, and the likes. The end of the year is fast approaching and from the conversations Jaehyun’s had with Taeyong, he knows his boss is interested in aggressively growing in the next year.

Ignoring the twisted feeling somewhere in his chest, Jaehyun collects his things, mutters a quiet goodbye to Johnny and Ten, and steps onto the elevator.

It’s been a while since he drove home in his own car…

But that’s neither here nor there.

 

Getting home at a normal time is something of a novel experience, but it’s not unwelcoming. Within minutes of entering the apartment and setting his things down his childhood room, his grandmother greets him with a warm smile. He accepts the roasted barley tea with a grateful smile, and they are in mid-conversation of the winter season and Christmas dinner when his mother comes home, an arm of groceries, the other with an envelope, damp from the snow outside.

Jaehyun immediately helps put the groceries away, but senses the contents of the envelope is making his mother seconds away from exploding in excitement, so he settles by his grandmother and waits for the news.

“I’m not pulling your leg here, I’m really not. But I just won!” His mother says with a wide grin, dimples on either side of her cheeks.

The two on the couch blink, and Jaehyun frowns. “Lottery? How much?”

His grandmother smacks his arm for being so materialistic, but sits a little straighter while eyeing at the envelop with interest anyway.

“Not the lottery. The grocery store was hosting a lucky draw, and I won first prize! It’s an all inclusive skiing trip to Pyeongchang, where they hosted the Winter Olympics a few years back.”

Jaehyun wrinkles his nose in remembrance, it’d been seven years. Beside him, his grandmother claps excitedly, jumping to her feet to look at the tickets in her hands. “'Stay with us at the traditional hot springs resort for 5 days, 4 nights! There is free parking, WiFi, access to the skiing range, and unlimited hot springs!' When is this- for _Christmas?_ Isn’t that a bit of a close call?”

Jaehyun’s heart stops as he remembers the third bullet point on his Secret Santa list: _‘A vacation for my family’_...

“Someone has my list,” he quietly exclaims in wonder.

His mother doesn’t catch it, she’s smiling excitedly and peeling the calendar from the wall to the table in front of them. “I know, I was thinking about that too. But dad is already wrapping up his lectures and preparing for the two week Christmas vacation, and my office closes for the Christmas week anyway, so it’s just Jaehyun who needs to check in with his boss…”

As a unit the two women turn to look at Jaehyun who tries to smile as offhandedly as he can.

“You know how work is. I’ve already used up my vacation days for the trip to Hawaii in spring! I can’t just disappear for another 3 days-”

“I know sweetie, but it’s so rare to win the lucky draw, and you’ve always loved snowboarding-”

“It doesn’t hurt to ask,” his grandmother adds, shooting him a pointed look. “You’ve been racking up overtime hours for weeks upon weeks, don’t they count for something?”

Feeling cornered, Jaehyun takes a few steps back. “Yeah, I’m _compensated_ for my overtime hours,” he says. But when he feels their glares on him the next second, he quickly adds, “but I can ask, of course I can ask.”

Satisfied, the two women huddle up again, discussing the location of the pension in relation to the ski mountains and the outdoor hot springs, and Jaehyun makes his escape. He has other things on his mind, like this random trip that his mother supposedly won...

There's no way this can be a coincidence, especially with a ski resort trip that probably costs his monthly pay.

But who would do this?


	2. love is love

Jaehyun has a person in mind, but it makes no sense. There’s no motive, no incentive.

Sure, he’ll admit that he’s hardworking, going above and beyond for the job, the company and for Taeyong, but it doesn’t mean that he’s suddenly earned this all-inclusive trip. Plus, nothing’s really changed- especially not Taeyong’s observable behaviour. Still the same stoic professionalism, the same small smiles of immense satisfaction when everything plays out according to expectations, the same snark.

But there’s no one else.

“Earth to Jaehyun, earth to Jaehyun, earth to-”

Jaehyun squeezes his eyes shut, then rolls over to face Doyoung and Sicheng's grinning faces. “I haven't gone deaf the last time I checked.”

Somewhere in the back, Sicheng gestures Chenle to stop the siren sounds… from his computer, not his mouth.

“Might need to check again,” Doyoung smirks.

“What were we talking about?” Jaehyun says, pushing past his wandering thoughts.

“ _We_ were talking about when we're showing up to dinner, I'm not sure where you went.”

_Ah, right._

The annual Christmas dinner is a longstanding tradition that happens on the Saturday before Christmas week and all workers are invited. Taeyong’s mother and father, ironically known as ‘Boss’ and ‘Big Boss’ by their respective companies, thought it would be a nice way to wrap up the year. Because of the nature of their companies, the rooms are usually separated by idol groups and paparazzi in one, and entertainment, production and broadcast in the others, but the paparazzis tend to flit to where Taeyong is if only to capture the ever-secretive man one more time.

Taeyong, who had all but avoided being in the public eye, bears these dinner parties with the grace and poise befitting of royalty. He smiles for the cameras, toasts to their companies’ success, and drinks as little as possible (because of his low tolerance and to stay coherent).

“When are you going?”

“Probably an hour after the photographic fanfare,” Doyoung hums contemplatively. “I don't get why they don't host a separate event for the idols, there are too many people as it is and the paparazzi are a pain in the ass.”

Sicheng nods in agreement. “The parties are great, the uninvited guest list not so much.”

Jaehyun shrugs. “Big Boss likes the free advertisement.”

“It's the face,” Sicheng comments, smirking.

“He's got too much of it,” Doyoung coughs, taking a jab at Big Boss’ receding hairline.

Jaehyun and Sicheng chuckle.

“What about you, Jae? Gonna be there on time again?” Doyoung asks.

Jaehyun shrugs. “Gotta greet the Bosses and all.”

“More like, you gotta keep the princeling company.” Smirks Sicheng.

Doyoung laughs, like he wasn’t the culprit of pointing out how Jaehyun threw himself into work and, consequently, to Taeyong. Jaehyun didn’t think it was that obvious and complained loudly when Doyoung brought it up. But then Sicheng raised an eyebrow at his reaction like saying, _Dude, why are you denying this? Weren’t you aware?_ Jaehyun realizes his closest coworker/friends might be able to read him like a book.

“That’s not the reason. I’m practically paid to be there from the get-go. If I had my way, I wouldn’t even think-”

“-about going. Yes, we know,” finishes Doyoung, grinning like he sees right through Jaehyun.

“You’re forgetting that Yuta, Johnny and Ten will likely show up earlier too, they’re a part of the founding group of LTY,” protests Jaehyun.

Doyoung waves him off. “Betting a twenty that they won’t be on time. It’s been five years of this song and dance, they’ll probably show up just before dinner starts, hype the party, then park themselves right by the open bar until the night wanes.”

It’s a very plausible outcome, mostly because that’s what happened last year (minus the tardiness). But Jaehyun won’t admit to it out loud if only to not let Doyoung have the satisfaction of being right.

“Just give that a thought,” Sicheng adds.

Jaehyun waves them off and quickly finishes his lunch.

He’ll admit, bantering with Taeyong has been a favourite past time of his. But he’s as much of an extrovert as he is an introvert; he doesn’t do well in social situations unless he’s in the mood for it. To be exposed to so many people, smile for so many cameras… that’s not something he enjoys. He also knows that Taeyong feels the same way, if not tenfold stronger.

It’s an obligation for the both of them.

A Slack notification on his phone lights up, displaying a message from Taeyong: _Do you have a minute?_

“Gotta go.”

Neither Doyoung nor Sicheng ask for elaboration, they’ve moved onto the topic of Ariana Grande’s latest tweet.

Jaehyun knocks twice, hears a muffled _Come in,_ then enters Taeyong's office.

“What's up?”

Taeyong doesn’t look up from his computer screen, but he does give a curt nod to acknowledge Jaehyun and goes right on typing something.

“Do you have some time this afternoon to look over a file for me? I'll need to send it off before the end of the day.”

Jaehyun nods. “Yeah I’ll have time, send it over.”

“Thanks.”

There was a long pause, because Jaehyun knows this isn't the reason Taeyong called him into the office. It takes as long to type the question as it does to speak it.

Then finally:

“You're not required to attend the Christmas dinner. It's not a mandatory event. Take it off and spend more time with your family.”

Jaehyun blinks.

“What?”

“It's not a mandatory event, and it lands on the weekend. I know how important it is for you to spend time with your family. You don't have to go.”

“But you’ll be there, right?”

“I- of course I will.”

“Thanks for giving me an out, but I think I'll be able to handle a few hours away from my family.” Jaehyun grins wryly. “To be honest, I haven't lived with them for so long and they're starting to grate on my nerves. It'll be a good breather.”

The typing stops, and Taeyong levels Jaehyun with a confused look above his monitor.

“You don't even like social events,” he says, perplexed.

Jaehyun shrugs. “You'll be there, and you hate it even more than I do.”

Taeyong turns his full attention on Jaehyun now, who notices a tinge of pink on his cheeks. Huh.

“Yeah, it's also my company.” His eyebrows draw into a frown, like Jaehyun is being exceptionally daft. “I'm giving you an out.”

Jaehyun snorts, because he understands. But he's also seen when Taeyong doesn’t know what to do, doesn’t know where to be in previous years, and he wants to be there for him. So, he changes tactics. “But wouldn’t you miss me if I didn't go?” He follows it with a wink.

Instead of the outright denial he expects, Taeyong stammers a weak: “No, not even a second.”

_It wasn't remotely convincing._

Taeyong clears his throat and tries again. “I see you every day of the week, I don't need to see you on the weekend too.”

Jaehyun smirks, approaching Taeyong. “Is what you say. You're secretly happy that I'm going though, right? I'll be there to keep you company.”

“Yuta and Johnny are going too-”

“They also regularly drive you up the wall. C'mon, just admit that you want me there.”

Taeyong scowls, taking a deep breath. Jaehyun expects to be kicked out of the office, but Taeyong does the opposite. “Of course I want you there,” -Jaehyun reels back in surprise- “you're an integral part of the company. This dinner is to pay thanks to workers like you for the hard work and overtime you put in.”

A soft pang of disappointment hits Jaehyun, and he tries to laugh it off. “I was just kidding-”

“It wouldn't be the same without you. I just wanted to give you an out in the event that you want to spend that time with family.”

The air in the office stills, like frozen in time. Jaehyun doesn't know how to respond. It sounds straightforward, but the emotions splayed in Taeyong's eyes, and the underlying words...

“So you'll be going?”

His throat feels dry, so Jaehyun nods instead.

Taeyong chews his bottom lip, looking down at the documents for a pause, then back up to meet his eyes, a show of gratefulness in his features. “Thanks Jaehyun, I really appreciate it.”

“You- Of course. Work is important to me.”

A pause.

“Right, of course.” Taeyong breaks their stare, hand reaching for a pen.

Jaehyun makes his way to the door. “Forward the documents. I’ll take a look before and send it back before 3.”

He doesn’t turn around, only catching Taeyong’s soft, low voice muttering, “Thanks.”

The door closes between them.

•••

Before he knows it, the end of the week comes in full swing and cars upon cars make their way into the grand hotel venue as women and men dressed to the nines stroll in on the black carpeted entrance.

As Jaehyun straightens his dark granite suit jacket, crisp white shirt and burgundy tie, he quietly marvels the interior of the hotel, the same hotel that hosted the Queen of England when she came to visit. When he nears the entrance to the party rooms, he sees a familiar form hovering by the door and smiles despite himself.

“Hey,” he greets the flitting figure, stopping a breath before collision.

Taeyong looks up from his phone in shock, then smiles sheepishly and says, “Hey, how’s it going?”

Jaehyun takes a moment to respond. It’s not because his brain short-circuited, he swears (but it might be). Taeyong looks very… good tonight. He has on a silky white shirt, an obsidian tie, and a midnight suit that fits like a glove, accentuating his trim, muscular figure. To top it off, his eyes are rimmed with a subtle eyeliner, his eyebrows slightly accentuated, and his skin evened to be camera ready; all in all- he’s breathtakingly handsome.

Jaehyun coughs, feeling awkward and out of place. “As well as can be. What are you doing?”

“Johnny and Yuta ditched me, and I don’t want to go in alone.”

_Ah._

Jaehyun bows with a smirk, sticking his arm out for Taeyong to take. “If I may ask for your hand to accompany me-”

Taeyong's lip twitches into a half smile and shoves Jaehyun’s shoulder. “Don’t even, idiot.”

Jaehyun straightens, a laugh to his timber voice. “You pay to keep this idiot around.”

“A decision I regret daily,” Taeyong says tersely, checking his watch again. Sighing, he nods once at Jaehyun and says, “Let’s go?”

“Sure.”

They enter the main hall and is immediately attacked by an onslaught of flashes. Taeyong, undeniably trained to the core, quickly straightens and pastes on his camera-ready face, which apparently translates to an intense smoulder. Jaehyun almost trips on his foot from the force of it.

They’re dragged into a chain of interviews, where Taeyong takes on most of the questions since they're related to his parents’ companies, his own company, and if he plans to join the entertainment company to be in front of the camera again. He handles it like a pro, smiling confidently while giving roundabout questions regarding, well, everything. It’s one thing to lead a successful company, another to flaunt.

Meanwhile, Jaehyun does his best to keep up his polite smile, but his face gets frozen after the eighth interview, and Taeyong quickly wraps up the questions with a cordial, “Funny that you ask about my parents, I should go and greet them soon before they throw a hissy fit! But thank you for joining us tonight, and I hope you have a great evening.”

Then he presses a steady hand to Jaehyun’s lower back and guides them away from the flashing cameras and into the private folds provided by the curtains next the windows. Jaehyun belatedly notices that Taeyong did this for his benefit, he probably looked like he was going to hyperventilate to oblivion.

“Doing okay?”

Jaehyun lets out a breath he wasn’t aware he was holding and straightens with a crooked smile. “Not gonna lie, it was pretty overwhelming. I don’t know how you do it.”

Taeyong shrugs, the smile on his face not reaching his eyes. “Practice.”

They share a quiet moment to themselves, standing by the windows looking out to the blinking lights of the city.

And in that moment, Jaehyun wants to tell Taeyong how amazing he is, for working through this hectic life, for facing his fears head-on, for finding balance in chaos. He doesn’t achieve what he achieves from being idle. He doesn’t achieve what he achieves for half-assing. He does his best at every turn of events, every surprise sprung upon him, and it’s very admirable.

Taeyong catches his stare from the corner of his eyes and smiles. “You’re staring.”

Jaehyun crimsons, looking away. “Sorry,” he utters.

After a long pause, Taeyong snorts squeezes Jaehyun’s arm, tugging him back. “Let’s go.”

 

After a brief greeting with Taeyong’s parents and some older workers from their companies, Taeyong’s father launches into an anecdote of how Taeyong and Jaehyun landed their bigger clients, calling them the undefeated dream team. His mother, pausing to take a sip of the champagne, claims that between the two of them, they could probably charm the naming rights of the client’s first born, even if the child is already a 30 year old grown ass adult.

Jaehyun likes to think she’s overestimating their ability, but he’s witnessed first hand that between his trustworthy smile, Taeyong’s smooth talk, and their combined charming looks, it’s _probably_ not an over-exaggeration.

By then, the party has kicked off and everyone’s settling to their assigned seats for the dinner. Taeyong shoots white hot glares of betrayal at Johnny and Yuta that go largely ignored and settles beside his parents at the host table.

Jaehyun squeezes between Johnny and Doyoung as they launch into yet another diatribe about the latest Spiderman movie, because that seems to be the movie Disney never lets die. Then the lights dim, and Big Boss takes the podium, makes a speech. It was long and groan-inducing from all the lame jokes he's crammed in there. When his speech is over, he’s quickly shoved away by the Boss making her speech. It was short and upbeat, speckled with hilarious and charming stories.

Chenle’s jaw drops, shaking Jisung’s leg as he whispers in awe, “She’s so cool! I didn’t realize that was where Taeyong got his, you know-”

“His charm?” Jisung supplies helpfully.

“Yeah! She’s so cool!” He gushes on.

Jisung laughs lowly and presses his hand on Chenle's thigh to stop him from hyperventilating. “Okay, okay. Chill dude.”

Johnny reaches a hand to pat Chenle's nape, and they quiet down. Finally, Taeyong takes the podium, and a murmur of appreciations echo through the room. Jaehyun feels a jab of something in his chest but suppresses it quickly.

“I know we’re all getting hungry, so I’ll try to keep this short. I’d like to thank my team, it wasn’t an easy year, but you crushed it. Thank you for your dedication, professionalism, and blood, sweat, and tears (though hopefully not too much of the latter).” There’s an echo of chuckles, and Jaehyun smiles fondly. “I also want to thank our partners and everyone working behind the scenes, you’re the reason our companies are here, well known and well loved. Happy holidays, and Merry Christmas.”

He gives a short bow, flashes one last polite smile, and leaves the stage.

The room erupts into applause, the appetizers are brought in, and the feast begins. Jaehyun muses that it feels like a wedding as he sips on some champagne, watching Taeyong and his parents make their way to each table, toasting and thanking everyone with jolly, gracious smiles. He then thinks of his parents, his grandmother and loses his appetite.

He excuses himself to use the bathroom, palming his phone. After a moment's consideration, he texts his mom.

 **Jaehyun**  
hey mom, how’s everything?

 **Mom**  
Dinner is delicious! Grandma is charmed by your friend, Mingyu  
She’ll probably ask him out

Jaehyun laughs despite himself.

 **Jaehyun**  
omg  
please stop her

 **Mom**  
I’ll do my best  
This is what you get for leaving your family to your friend while you pursue your love interest  
I mean, attend your company Christmas dinner.

 **Jaehyun**  
Mom

 **Mom**  
Kidding. Not really.

 **Jaehyun**  
i’m ignoring that  
have a good dinner with dad and grandma

 **Mom**  
Ah, dismissing your family again. It’s ok, I get it.  
Go get ‘im!

 **Jaehyun**  
BYE MOM

He lets out a soft sigh and looks back at the party through the door. It doesn't hurt to check. At least his grandmother sounds as lively as ever.

He checks his watch and wonders, very briefly, if he’s made the right decision.

“Hey.”

He knows, even before he turns around, who the voice belonged to. Taking a breath, he scrambles for composure, only to realize he hasn't much of that left. His smile comes off shakier than he wants.

Taeyong frowns immediately, sensing that something’s off. “Are you okay? Did something happen?”

Jaehyun raises a hand to hold Taeyong at arm’s length so he doesn’t get any closer, doesn’t broach his space. But Taeyong steps close anyway, so close that he can smell his cologne, a neat lavender scent, and the crease of his frown deepens. “Everything’s fine, I was just checking up on my parents,” he says hurriedly.

Taeyong sighs, squeezing Jaehyun’s shoulder and sliding down to hold his wrist in a loose but firm hold. “I saw you leave, I thought something- you. You really don’t need to be here, I’m sure-”

Jaehyun shakes his head, having heard enough of this. “Look, I’m already here. You can’t get rid of me that easily.”

“That’s not the point. I just-”

Suddenly, Jaehyun reverses their hold and tightens his grip around Taeyong’s hands. “It’s okay, really. Thank you for worrying about me. I’ll let you know if I need to leave early, okay?”

Taeyong’s eyes searches in Jaehyun’s for a minute longer, then he nods and looks away.

It’s only then that Jaehyun realize how close they are and takes a few steps back, letting go in the process. “Sorry,” he mutters to the ground.

Taeyong lets out a shaky breath, and reaches for Jaehyun’s sleeve, only to freeze in the middle, and let his arm drop again. He smiles a little, no doubt trying to stay light-hearted despite the fact that he's overstepped, and nudges Jaehyun’s shoulder. “Let’s go back?”

Jaehyun nods with a crooked smile of his own.

The main doors have closed for an event, or so they were told, so they took one of the side doors back in. The low murmur of conversation in the room stops so suddenly you could hear a pin drop. The lights are on them in an instant, and the room gasps and laughs and cheers.

_What?_

Johnny whistles and points to something above them, and Mark shouts, “Look up, look up!”

As a unit, they look up to see a sprig of mistletoe hanging above them…

Jaehyun's eyes quickly sweep to the other doors and sees more mistletoe being hung up, and Taeyong's parents are standing in front of them with their jaws dropped. They must've interrupted the intermission dinner game.

The chanting for them to kiss was quiet at first, then grows louder and louder. Jaehyun's cheeks colour a bright tomato as he smiles politely, trying to laugh it off and return to his seat. His emotions are already a mess from trying to figure Taeyong out, to guessing who his other Secret Santa might be, to the conversation that happened seconds ago. It isn't the right time or place. They shouldn't, they can't-

The press from the sides of the room immediately close in, encouraging them to lean in for a little peck. _It's harmless, it would be cute,_ they say. _You don't want to ruin the fun, do you?_ The lens of their cameras glint in the light, and Jaehyun feels a sudden surge of anger through him. Was this what Taeyong had to go through when he was younger, bending to the media with the threat of bad press?

He takes a step forward, about to call it off when a hand stops him. He looks back to see Taeyong flashing a disheartened smile at the room, then turning to Jaehyun with a quiet question in his eyes.

“I know it's a lot to ask-” he starts, but Jaehyun gets it.

He inhales deeply and nods.

Takes a step in, his hand reaches tentatively for Taeyong's waist as Taeyong's hand rests on his arm, holding him in place. His heart races a mile a minute, watching Taeyong tilt his head up, eyes sliding shut.

_Jaehyun wants this. God he wants this so much but not this way…_

The first press of lips on lips is shy and experimental, but in that moment, Jaehyun doesn't care. If this is the only chance, he's going to take as much as he can. He pulls Taeyong in a little deeper, pressing his lips more insistently against the man in his arms.

Taeyong gasps in surprise and he gains entrance, sliding his tongue in. Taeyong tastes clean, like the water he's been sipping in light of the toasts he's had to do. His familiar lavender cologne floods Jaehyun's senses, making his knees feel weak. It’s cliché, but he feels an electricity shock when their tongue's touch, and he fights to dominate the slighter man, who lets out the softest squeak when he presses too far…

Then his senses come back to the present, where he registers the loud catcalls and wolf whistles, and pulls back immediately.

Fuck, he just made out with his boss. In front of the companies _and Taeyong’s parents._

His heart jumps a beat, and the shock must be showing on his face because Taeyong's mother immediately steps in to the rescue, dismissing her son and Jaehyun quickly while carrying on with the rules of the game. The room slowly eases back into the mistletoes and the press, having gotten front seats to the show, seem to be satisfied with their latest capture and moved away.

Taeyong recovers first, stepping out in front of Jaehyun and laughing and waving the awkward air away. Jaehyun snaps to his senses a second later, and hurries back to his seat, turning red from head to toe. Thankfully no one makes a comment (though it's pretty hard to ignore the twin gawking from Jisung and Chenle), and the rest of the dinner goes by smoothly.

When the dessert plates are cleared and the dance floor opens up, most of Jaehyun's table spring to action, doubling on the drinks and one-two step's. Jaehyun hangs back, stirring absentmindedly at his gin and tonic when he feels a tap on his shoulder, and Taeyong's mother smiles apologetically down at him.

“May I have a word?”

“Sure, Boss- I mean, Ms. Choi.” He stands immediately, the words tumbling out of him. Choi is her maiden name, one she never gave up when she got married and had children.

They quietly move out of the room and to a balcony terrace, where the curtains provided a degree of privacy from prying eyes and ears. Taeyong’s mom turns to him with empathetic eyes, shadowing the spark of knowledge is ever-present.

“I'm really sorry about what happened just now. The event was lined up to start and I'd expected volunteering couples, not unsuspecting boys. How are you feeling?”

Feeling all sorts of awkward, Jaehyun waves it off as nonchalantly as he can. “It was surprising, but it's over and done now. I'm sure Taeyong had the worse end of the deal here.”

He chuckles sheepishly while scratching the back of his head, but meets the eye of one calculative mother and the laugh dies in his throat.

“I wouldn't be so sure. You're Jaehyun, right?”

Jaehyun nods, perplexed by her words. Then he recognizes the look. She watches him with the same judgment as one would to an outlier of an experiment, before finally breaking into a small, secretive smile. “Thank you for always taking care of our Taeyong. It's comforting to know he's in good hands.”

Jaehyun blinks confused and she grins and pats his arm.

“Please enjoy the rest of your evening,” she says as she walks away, the clicks of her stilettos growing faint with each step. Jaehyun stands frozen as he watches her retreating back, then slowly moves back to the room- avoiding the main entrances as he does.

_What the hell did that even mean?_

The dance party is happening full swing at the centre, where Ten and Mark show that they can, indeed, shake what their mothers gave them. Jisung then pushes them aside and displays a full round of popping and locking techniques that has everyone cheering and applauding, Chenle being the loudest of them all.

Taeyong stands off to the side, an amused look about his eyes as he engaged in a soft conversation with Johnny, Doyoung and Sicheng.

Jaehyun makes his way to join them, only to see Yuta tumbling into the group with a wide smile and a charming sparkle in his eyes. After a quick exchange, he pulls Taeyong onto the dance floor, and that's when he sees Jaehyun. Taeyong smiles crookedly and waves, but he's whisked away before Jaehyun has a chance to wave back. A second later, they’re lost in the big circle of people dancing to the music. Jaehyun sighs softly and joins the group.

Doyoung wiggles his eyebrows and Johnny laughs and tells him to cut it off. Jaehyun rolls his eyes and unloads another flute of champagne from the server's tray because alcohol seems to be the only way to slow everything so he can make sense of it all.

“Should've kept the paparazzi out and taken those pictures myself, I could use some side cash.” Doyoung teases.

“Or you could just spend less on things you don't need,” Jaehyun points out, rolling his eyes.

Johnny snorts. “On that note, I still haven’t gotten presents for my folks yet. What can you give to someone who claims they don't need anything?”

“Grandchildren,” Doyoung answers easily. “That's literally all my parents talk about when I call them. It’s horrifying.”

Jaehyun hums. “That there are baby versions of you terrorizing the world? Yeah, it’s downright nightmarish.”

“It's horrifying because I'm still _single_ , asshat. You can't skip steps the way you skip grades-”

“Well actually,” Jaehyun starts.

“-surrogates are a thing,” Johnny continues.

Doyoung rolls his eyes. “And deal with more paperwork and bureaucratic bullshit? I already have enough of that at work.”

Johnny quirks an eyebrow. “So you've considered?”

Doyoung clears his throat awkward and waves his hand to dismiss the topic. “ _Anyway._ ”

As they ease into another discussion, Jaehyun's eyes unconsciously wander back to the dance floor, searching for one man.

A familiar laugh rings out, and Taeyong's face pops up from the centre, dancing with Yuta and Ten, laughing so hard he almost doubles over. It’s like he’s growing closer to everyone but Jaehyun.

A flash of frustration charges through Jaehyun's veins, and his grip on the glass tightens.

“You should join them.”

Jaehyun turns around to catch Sicheng hide his smile behind his wine and shakes his head.

“I think I might go, actually,” he grumbles, downing the rest of his drink.

Doyoung quirks a brow. “So soon?”

“A family thing came up.”

He puts down the flute and bids hasty farewells to everyone before turning to the dance floor. A second's hesitation later, he grows even more annoyed and leaves.

If he looked back, he would've seen the confused expression on Taeyong's face, followed by a mix of surprise and concern. He would've seen Taeyong take a few steps to the door only to be pulled back by Ten, who mistakes his intention and laughs and twists him into another song. He would’ve seen Taeyong shake his head, like he’s read it all wrong, and allow himself the distraction of dance and music, ignoring the pain in his chest.

•••

Going home is not an option, his mother would ask why he came back so early, so Jaehyun returns to his apartment with a long sigh and tiredly toes off his shoes. He sheds the tie, shirt and suit into a crumpled pile on the ground, switches his contacts for rimmed glasses, and pulls a blanket on himself on the couch.

The world is spinning, not because he drank, but because too much has happened.

He thought he’d be able to withstand the brunt of socializing and the interviews, but the kiss and the way Taeyong avoids him afterwards like it was a mistake...

Jaehyun pulls the blankets higher, burying himself and his heart. There was no way he could’ve stayed in the same room after that, the distance was too stifling, the air too emotionally charged. He should’ve known that an office romance was the furthest thing from Taeyong’s mind, should’ve known that Taeyong didn’t see him that way.

He sniffles, burrowing into the couch, and falls asleep with a heavy heart.

•••

It’s later in the evening when Jaehyun wakes up to the vibration of his phone. He frowns, rubbing the sleep of his eyes as his other hand locates the source of the buzzing sound- his phone had somehow slid all the way by his foot.

3 missed calls and one new message.

He frowns, checking the ID, and his eyes immediately widen. He immediately opens the message, from an SMS that has never been used before:

_Come down._

Bewildered and feeling almost like in a dream, Jaehyun slips on his grey slippers and jogs to the elevator, bringing him to the ground floor. If his head and heart were a jumbled mess before, there’s no way to describe what he’s feeling now. He smooths his wrinkled sweatshirt and lounge pants and runs his hand through his hair to make himself more presentable. The elevators door open and he quickly turns towards the glass doors.

And there, all the way at the front, is a shivering Taeyong wearing the mightiest scowl he’d ever seen.

Jaehyun immediately opens the doors and invites him into the lobby. In the seconds where Taeyong brushes past him, he feels the cold air radiating from Taeyong’s body.

“How long were you waiting for?” He asks, shock evident in his face.

“What the hell were you doing?” Taeyong sneers, teeth chattering as a shiver goes up his spine.

It’s only then when Jaehyun notices that Taeyong isn’t wearing a jacket. Without another word, he tugs on Taeyong’s hand, leading him down the hall and into an elevator.

Jaehyun growls. “Stop answering my question with another question. How long were you standing out there for? Where’s your jacket? Where’s your car? What are you doing here?”

He pulls off his sweater and pulls the sleeves around Taeyong’s shoulder, then realizes that he hasn’t even pressed the number and rectifies that. Taeyong sniffs, staring at his shoes while endless shivers run through his body, but he doesn’t push Jaehyun away.

“About twenty minutes. I forgot my jacket in the car, which is with Taeil, who has the rest of the night off because it’s Christmas-”

The elevator stops, and Jaehyun places a hand on the small of Taeyong’s back, guiding the man down another hallway. The lock unlocks from the proximity of his key, and he pushes the door open, immediately greeted by a wall of warm air.

“Concierge gone for twenty minutes, that’s… I can’t believe you didn’t just leave. Do you want something warm to drink? Tea? Hot chocolate?”

Taeyong sniffs again, and peers at Jaehyun through his long lashes. With his cheeks and lips reddened from the cold, and eyes impossibly wide, he looks small and pitiful. Jaehyun wants nothing more than to pull him into his arms and warm and comfort him. What he does is the sensible thing, maneuvering Taeyong to his couch and bundling him up with the blanket (on top of his sweater) that’s still warm from his nap.

Taeyong mumbles a quiet thank you, looking down at the hands clasped on his lap. The soft light that falls on him accentuates his angular jaw and pouty lips, which sends an unexpected heat through Jaehyun’s cheeks and his mind elsewhere that he almost misses Taeyong’s words:

“Hot chocolate, please.”

Jaehyun clears his throat and looks away. “Right, okay.”

He puts the kettle on the convection stove top, willing his hormones and emotions to calm the fuck down with limited success. Halfway through some very unsexy thoughts, he remembers that Taeyong hasn’t answered why he was here in the first place and looks over the kitchen island to where his boss is currently standing and looking out his window.

There is nothing short of some kind of surrealism to this scene before him.

Taeyong looks tiny when bundled up in a blanket several sizes bigger than he, covering him head to toe with fuzzy warm grey. Since Jaehyun forgot about the lights when he rushed to retrieve him from the freezing cold, the apartment is dimly lit, setting a cozy atmosphere. That’s when he notices a slip of white that Taeyong is fiddling with in his hands.

“What’s that?”

Taeyong looks at him, hands stilling. He looks down, then back up and Jaehyun, and chews on his lip again. Jaehyun squints, the kettle slowly heating up and making soft hisses through the spout. Then it all clicks in place, and he has the sudden urge to turn tail and run away. It can't be.

“It’s…” Taeyong trails, cheeks pink. Jaehyun has never seen him this shy and hesitant before. Then he looks like he's made up his mind and glances directly at Jaehyun. “It’s for you.”

He extends his hand and Jaehyun takes the familiar piece of paper with two hands and a falling heart. He doesn’t need to look to know what it is. It’s his Secret Santa List, the one that never should’ve been seen.

He doesn't dare look up when he says, “I thought I threw this out. How do you have this?”

Taeyong looks away, down at his feet, and out the window again. “I got it tonight, right after you left me-” he inhales sharply, “the party without saying anything.”

The bitterness in his voice is as clear as the stars in the sky, Jaehyun looking up in shock from the carpeted floor.

They jump when the kettle goes off, and Jaehyun quickly tends to it, making some hot chocolate for Taeyong and tea for himself. They settle on opposite sides of the couch, Jaehyun taking a slow inhale, attempting to make sense of the situation.

“Who?”

“Yuta, my parents, the whole team was in on it.” Taeyong admits, a fierce blush creeping on his cheeks.

That's when Jaehyun understands.

Doyoung and Sicheng dropped subtle hints about being at the Christmas dinner on time since the beginning of the week. Yuta probably made the suggestion of taking lunch at the ramen restaurant after team meeting, to Taeyong's reluctant acceptance. Johnny and Ten tipped Taeyong off when he got to their table, sending the worried man after him as the dinner intermission game proceeded. Then the knowing look in Taeyong's mother's eyes when they came back in together under the mistletoe-

“What… why would they do that?”

…

Taeyong looks at the mug in his hands in silence, then: “I told Yuta about your grandmother, I wanted to know if there was anything I could do without being- without pushing my boundaries as your employer. I wanted to help you in some way...”

Jaehyun's heart hammers in his chest. It feels like time has slowed as he continued to push. “Then this list…”

Taeyong shrugs, setting the mug down. “Yu must've somehow gotten hold of it. It didn't sound like something you would officially submit. He must've talked to Johnny, who got everyone else involved.” He takes a deep breath and continues, “Care to explain the last item?”

Jaehyun blushes. He almost wants to call quits. His emotions have already gone through a rough ride, any more if it would be too much. But...

“It's because I like you,” he admits, staring directly at Taeyong.

Taeyong's eyes widen in shock.

“I didn't mean for anyone to find this list, but I meant what I wrote,” Jaehyun takes a deep breath, gathering the courage to meet Taeyong's gaze. “I like you and I... I want to be with you.”

_It's now or never._

He moves closer to Taeyong, their knees almost touching. “Do you have anything to say to that?”

Taeyong reels back as though burned. But he doesn't move from the couch, like the force of Jaehyun's stare is physically pinning him down.

“I… like you too. I've liked you from the moment you stepped into my office, introducing yourself as the new account manager, I-” he rambles, cheeks colouring to an interesting shade of red too. “I didn't think you were into men, I didn't know you liked me-”

_Oh, for fuck's sakes._

Jaehyun silences him with a bruising kiss, pressing all of his emotions, three years of wanting, of waiting, of being afraid to explore this quiet attraction into the kiss. Taeyong makes a sound of surprise, but quickly melts into the kiss, cupping Jaehyun's jaw to draw him close, angle him so their lips slot together like puzzle pieces.

Jaehyun moans into their connected lips when he feels Taeyong card his fingers through his locks, playing with the baby hairs on his nape as he draws him in again and again, kiss after kiss.

When they break apart to catch their breaths Jaehyun is shocked to find that he’s halfway on top of Taeyong, who seems as surprised as he is for half a second, before grinning shyly and pulling him down by the collar of his sweater, wanting to taste more of his lips, feel more of his heat above him, around him…

Jaehyun pulls back again, breathless and lips bruised, trying in vain to… oh, he doesn't know, not put out on the first… date? What does this even make them?

Taeyong must've seen the conflict in his eyes, because he makes a low sound of want and whines into the sensitive skin of Jaehyun's neck. Their positions flip in a quick motion, and Jaehyun finds himself trapped between the arms (and legs, his mind helpfully supplies) of one sexy, thoroughly kissed Lee Taeyong.

“Sh-shouldn't we take it easy?” He stammers, initial assertiveness gone out the window.

Taeyong snorts, showing exactly why he's the boss of the company by demanding Jaehyun's silence in another series of thorough kisses, smirking into the warm skin when Jaehyun becomes too breathless to retaliate.

“Had I known your feelings, I would've called you into my office ages ago…” Jaehyun blushes at the implications and moans into Taeyong's neck, who chuckles softly in response. “Do you really want to take it easy, Mr. I Want A Kiss from My Boss?”

“Oh shut up.” Jaehyun complains, one hand cupping Taeyong's chin, the other pulling his hips down to meet his upwards thrust. They both hiss at the delicious pressure, leaving them gasping and seeing spots of white.

“Bedroom,” Taeyong whispers.

Jaehyun doesn't need to be told twice. He hooks his arms under Taeyong, lifting him up like he weighs nothing and moves to his bedroom where the heater is a little weaker. Taeyong shivers and pulls close to Jaehyun again, who understands immediately and kicks up the thermostat a few degrees before turning back to the mattress, where Taeyong somehow ends up in a tangled mess between his suit jacket, the sweater and the grey blanket.

Jaehyun laughs, low and hearty, and patiently untangles Taeyong despite the frustrated sounds coming from the trapped kit. “Hold on, hold on, it’s caught here-”

The fold of fabric unravels and Taeyong shrugs his jacket off, happy to be rid of the constricting material. A moment later, his white shirt follows the same path downwards. Jaehyun chuckles under his breath and presses against Taeyong again, happily claiming his lips in a series of kisses as they ease on the mattress.

“Do you have a preference?” He asks in a low rumble, dragging his warm lips down Taeyong’s pale neck and tasting the soft, sweet skin.

Taeyong moans softly. “No, do you?”

Jaehyun hums, nudging Taeyong's jaw with his nose. “I don't normally, but…”

Taeyong smiles wryly, and at the flip of a switch it becomes all sex and charm and none of the hesitation from just a second ago. “Let me guess.”

Jaehyun snorts and pulls Taeyong close for a peck, trying to act like he's not surprised from the sudden onslaught of sexual appeal. “Guess away.”

Taeyong's smile grows into a full-fledged smirk and flips their position in the blink of an eye. He sits himself on Jaehyun's lap, settling gently, and tips Jaehyun's chin up to whisper, “This is how you'd want to start, me on top, grinding down.”

His hip lowers with his words, applying just the right amount of pleasure on Jaehyun, all playful and teasing and calculated. Jaehyun lets out a low moan, a hand gripping to Taeyong's hip, conflicted between pulling him downwards or holding him in place because this is getting close to his fantasies.

Taeyong smirks into the kiss and nudges Jaehyun's mouth open, pressing his tongue to lick and taste the other. As he rotates his hips in a rhythmic pattern, he feels the hardening member twitch underneath him, adding to the thrill from this show of domination.

Jaehyun detaches their lips with an audible pop, twisting his head slightly to catch his breath, leaving a long, pale neck for Taeyong to feast. “Think you got me all figured out, huh?”

Taeyong smirks, wetly mouthing the spot right under Jaehyun’s ear. “I know some things,” he hums sweetly into Jaehyun’s ear, smirking when he feels a shiver go through the body underneath him. “But I’m more so a quick learner.”

Taeyong licks heated lines down Jaehyun’s neck before roughly tugging the t-shirt off to reveal more milky white skin. He almost purrs in satisfaction. His mouth presses butterfly kisses down the built torso until he reaches Jaehyun’s thick happy trail, and closer to where Jaehyun wants him to be if the small thrusting motions of his hips are anything to go by.

He lifts himself off slightly to palm Jaehyun’s dick through the soft fabric of his sweatpants. “Now how long do you plan to keep these on?”

Jaehyun’s about to respond, but Taeyong interrupts him and tugs them off with his teeth.

Let’s see that again.

He tugs them off. With his teeth.

Then he licks his cock from bottom up in one agonizingly slow stroke Jaehyun almost comes from it.

Taeyong smirks, knowing he has Jaehyun’s full attention, and puts on a show. His eyes narrow as he tilts his head lower, and lower, until his impossibly pink lips stretch around the tip of Jaehyun’s dick, then his tongue peeks out from underneath to tease the thick vein there.

Jaehyun, previously watching the fantasy show before him, throws his head back so fast he smashes into the wall. The groan that comes after has less to do with the pain from his head and more pleasure from his… well, other head.

“Nh, fuck. Yong, you feel so good,” he moans throatily, carding strong fingers through Taeyong’s hair.

“Mmm,” hums Taeyong, satisfied at the reaction.

There is a lot to fit, but Taeyong takes the challenge (pardon the pun) head on and pushes further and further until his nose _almost_ touches the hairs. Jaehyun’s breath hitches. It’s been so long, and Taeyong feels so fucking good.

“Close, fuck I’m going to come-” he barely manages to say.

Taeyong keeps his lips sealed around Jaehyun’s length, pulling off slightly so the ejaculate doesn’t choke him. One more lick upwards, and Jaehyun's hips stutter in an erratic beat as rope after rope of white hot come shoots into Taeyong's eagerly waiting mouth.

Taeyong slows his movements but doesn't stop, pumping Jaehyun until he’s dry before he pulls off.

He wipes his mouth with he back of his hand, a warm, boyish look in his eyes.

“That was faster than I expected,” he teases.

Jaehyun exhales deeply through his nose like he just ran a marathon. His grip on Taeyong's hair loosens to a slack hold, and Taeyong slides up to capture him in soft kisses again only to be pushed back weakly, like Jaehyun is actually mad about his teasing comment.

“That was years in the making, asshole,” Jaehyun growls to the ceiling, wiping the sweat from his brows with an arm.

“Stop calling me asshole just cos you’re thinking about mine. And did you say years?”

Jaehyun barks out a laugh, trying to push past his slip up. “Cheeky. Weren't you the one who said you liked me from the moment I stepped into your office?”

Taeyong blushes and glares fiercely. It is as intense as it is adorable and makes Jaehyun's heart expand a bit in his chest.

“Liked you as an employee. The feelings didn't come until maybe a year later,” clarifies Taeyong, embarrassed. He crawls up and settles on Jaehyun's lap with intention. “How long was it for you?”

Jaehyun flushes pink as their gazes meet.

“A while,” he says vaguely.

Taeyong smirks and cups Jaehyun's chin, a thumb brushing against the well-kissed lips. “You said years, so it’s over a year?”

“Maybe,” Jaehyun answers evasively.

Taeyong's grin widens. “Two years?”

Jaehyun scrunches his nose like he doesn’t want to admit it, the number’s too revealing of how long he’s had these feelings for (and how long he didn't do a thing about it). Instead, he breaks the stare to focus on other parts on Taeyong's face, landing on the scar under his right eye. His expression changes to one of curiosity as his hand reaches for it, thumb brushing just under the scar.

“How did this come about?”

Taeyong grins like he knows anyway and Jaehyun huffs. “Atopy, I've always had it. One day I scratched it too much and it bled everywhere, then it scabbed over and this scar was formed.”

Jaehyun looks between a cross of concern and horror, and he bursts out in laughter at it.  “It's a minor skin condition and doesn't affect me anymore, but I had considerably less self-control when I was younger,” he elaborates.

Holding Jaehyun's soft hand, Taeyong presses a reassuring kiss on his wrist and feels the shiver run down his body. There are even goosebumps forming on his arms. With Jaehyun underneath him not wearing a single thread, their physical reactions become a little... challenging to hide.

Jaehyun blushes when Taeyong raises a single brow.

“When was the last time you’ve been with someone?” Taeyong teases. He doesn’t expect an answer, but he gets one anyway:

“A year at least. My nights have been otherwise preoccupied with work, and vacation doesn’t equate to banging the locals,” Jaehyun says, wrapping a soft hand around Taeyong, who hisses in response.

“I didn’t expect an answer, to be honest,” he grits out, ignoring the delicious pressure Jaehyun is applying around his shaft, squeezing his base like a ring and oh, oh god these big, talented hands-

“What about you?”

The question comes out too direct, but Jaehyun has never been one to lie well. Taeyong can read the possessiveness in his eyes like black on white, and it scares him how trusting and open the man before him is when they’ve only gotten more intimately acquainted not even an hour ago.

It’s also distracting when the man he’s been crushing on has his hand around his dick.

“A few months? I-” The pressure around him tightens just shy of pain, but Taeyong hisses and shoots a warning glare at Jaehyun anyway. “Cut that shit out. I’m allowed to fuck whoever I want to.”

“Well aware,” Jaehyun grumbles, resuming his agonizingly slow pumping. A pearly dollop of precum oozes from Taeyong’s tip and his thumb smears it on his cocks, gripping a little tighter and resumes his ministrations.

Taeyong moans, body curling to rest his forehead on Jaehyun’s shoulder and giving in to the sensations. “Is exclusivity important to you?” He whispers.

“Again, usually no. But somehow…” Jaehyun huffs, collecting his emotions. “You’re becoming the exception to every rule. I don’t think I can see you with someone else, especially when you’re with me.”

“Possessive~” Taeyong teases softly, breath hitching when Jaehyun twists his hand when he gets to the tip. _But god, it’s been a long few months-_ “I saw that about your work though. You tend to pitch head-first into everything you do.”

Jaehyun's lips twist into a crooked smile. “Are we still talking about work?”

Taeyong smirks. “You haven't done anything to persuade me otherwise.”

Jaehyun narrows his eyes. “Oh, you need persuasion now?”

Taeyong doesn't retaliate when Jaehyun flips their position, falling onto his back with a smirk like this was all a part of a plan. Jaehyun hovers above him for a moment, a hand palming the bulge between Taeyong's legs, separated by thin layers of pant suit fabric.

“Tell me, what kind of persuasion do you need?” Jaehyun mumbles, dark and heady into Taeyong's pulse point. His deft fingers work into Taeyong's belt, which is soon pulled away. Taeyong helps him by unbuttoning and unzipping and kicking off the rest, too eager for further delay.

“All that you can think of,” he replies with a challenge in his tone, and a tease to his smile.

Jaehyun smirks, already reaching into his night stand drawer for the familiar bottle square packet. “Think you can take that much?”

“Try me.”

Without another word, Jaehyun pulls Taeyong's ankles to the edge of the bed, where he sinks to his knees and coats the lube on his fingers. His eyes stare up at Taeyong's shocked face, and the smirk opens to wet heat that is soon surrounding Taeyong's cock. One hand holds Taeyong's hips in place while the other teasingly strokes the sensitive tissue between his asshole and balls.

He bobs his head shallowly, sucking and flicking his tongue around the flared mushroom head. Taeyong groans at the sensation with firmly closed eyes, arms weakly propping him up to watch Jaehyun.

Because damn does he knows how to pick up Taeyong's clues. A sharp inhale has Jaehyun slowing down, taking his sweet time so Taeyong doesn't get anywhere near the edge, only feeling the climb of pleasure in an agonizingly steady pace. When a soft whine escapes Taeyong's mouth, and the lips around him tightens as the mouth sinks in further.

Taeyong's hips thrust upwards, trying to get more of the heat around him, feel more. Then he feels the fingers run gently over his crinkled hole and unconsciously parts his legs further to give air to his sex. Back and forth the tip of Jaehyun's fingers tease along Taeyong's most sensitive parts, gently easing a bit more into the widening cavern. When a soft tremble starts up at Taeyong's abdomen, Jaehyun pauses sucking and plunges his finger into the narrow channel.

Taeyong yelps in surprise, his pleasure conflicted between the denial of orgasm and the discomfort of being stretched so roughly. His dick twitches in Jaehyun's mouth. Jaehyun responds by thrusting his finger shallowly for a dozen more beats as his other hand strokes Taeyong up back to a happy state. A moment later he adds a finger, stretching and pushing and feeling the tight cavern squeezing him so nicely.

He looks up and catches Taeyong staring at him in tense anticipation and stands to his feet. The condom is handed to Taeyong (since Jaehyun's hands are a mess), who obliges and makes quick work of the packet while Jaehyun cleans his hands. Seconds later, the thick member is coated liberally with lube and pushing into the tight fit of Taeyong's ass. They groan at the pressure, one from being stretched, the other being squeezed.

“Give me- fuck, a second,” Jaehyun utters into the soft skin of Taeyong's clavicle, groaning as Taeyong tightens around him. Huh.

Taeyong wiggles his hips in a tantalizing way that has Jaehyun grow even harder inside, because fuck if he doesn't already look attractive when clothed in a three-piece suit, but when he's naked with disheveled hair, pink cheeks, bruised lips and big, dark, lustful eyes- it’s enough to haunt Jaehyun for nights on end. To add to that, there's a delightful pleasure building at the base of his abdomen making him clench his jaw to stop from coming so quickly again.

“Yong,” he hisses.

“Distract me,” comes the breathless reply, a cross between plea and demand.

Jaehyun wraps an arm around Taeyong’s middle and lifts him to the centre of the bed. Taeyong hooks his arms around Jaehyun’s neck, grunting when he feels Jaehyun shift inside him, brushing against a spot that makes him gasp and moan softly, but enough for Jaehyun to pick up on.

Once settled, Taeyong attaches his lips onto Jaehyun, rolling his hips upwards to press more intimately against Jaehyun, loving the touch of skin on skin. Jaehyun presses back, licking the seams of Taeyong’s lips before being granted entry. Feeling that Taeyong’s relaxed a little, he gives an experimental thrust in the spot that he moved against earlier and-

“Ah- fuck, Jaehyun-”

He smirks.

“Got you.”

He starts a trail of open-mouthed kisses from Taeyong’s mouth, down his jawline to the soft underside of his ear, to just below his pulse, then lower still to his clavicle. His other hand brushes against the tip of Taeyong’s hardness, then grips it a little tighter and Taeyong groans against the back of his hand, hating and loving the way Jaehyun is making him feel. He pants, whines, and arches each time the thick intrusion stretches him a little more.

Jaehyun enjoys the growing tightness around him and pumps Taeyong in time to his thrusts, loving the way the tense lines in Taeyong’s body melts away to something dark and heedy and completely laced with want. Taeyong places distracted wet kisses where his mouth can reach, and when Jaehyun thrusts more powerfully, bites into the skin.

He lets out a soft whimper when Jaehyun twists his hand on his tip and brings his hand up to muffle the sound again. When Jaehyun pauses his motions, Taeyong’s eyes open to see his teasing smile as he leans downwards, and gently but firmly guides Taeyong’s hands above his head. Jaehyun presses a soft kiss on Taeyong’s ear and whispers, “How can I hear you if you keep doing that?”

He turns vermillion, and struggles to kick Jaehyun away, but the other hikes his legs up so he can’t gain footing and closes in.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He teases, pulling Taeyong’s bottom lip into his mouth.

“Nnh Jae, ah-” Taeyong yelps, squeezing his eyes again when Jaehyun rotates his hips while fully sheathed, pressing against his prostate. “Fuck, you feel so fucking good.”

Jaehyun hums, enjoying the tightness of the warm, wet hole clutching onto his member like a vise. Taeyong whines and presses wet kisses on Jaehyun where he can reach- the cage of his arms, the pale column of his neck, the wide expanse of his chest...

Jaehyun’s impact gets stronger and stronger as he tries to push more and more of his engorged penis into the body underneath him. Taeyong’s smaller body gets staggered by his repeated blows and he abandons all forms of tenderness to clutch onto him. Jaehyun pauses to collect his ankles and pushes them up so he can enter from a different angle and more deeply.

The build of tension and pressure heightens and Taeyong yelps in surprise. He pulls Jaehyun down for sloppy wet kisses that leaves a trail of saliva between them when they break apart for a breath-

“Jae I’m close, I’m so fucking close- Jae, please-”

Jaehyun groans and cages the man under him and thrusts even faster deeper. “Don’t hold back,” he orders. “Give me everything.”

“Fuck, fuck, right there, fuck me harder right there-”

“Right here?”

“Yes. God fuck I’m gonna- Jae-”

“Give. It. To. Me.”

Taeyong surrenders, head yanking to his nape as he comes. His hips grind down to get as much of Jaehyun into him as he can, who keeps fucking him through his orgasm. His muscles milks Jaehyun’s cock and carries him over the edge. With a few more thrusts, he presses himself firmly against the furthest he can reach, and squirts forcefully into the rubber.

The feeling of the member growing even more before it twitches and shudders inside his body pulls Taeyong into a chain of spasms that starts from his lower abdomen to the back of his head, then out his  fingers, and toes. It shakes him so thoroughly that he involuntarily jerks downwards again, impaling himself fully onto Jaehyun’s twitching cock.

Needless to say, they both need a moment to come back to their senses.

Taeyong comes to first, wiggling his hips slightly to feel the softening member plop out, forcing Jaehyun to also snap out of the high to clean the discharge between them. Jaehyun disposes of the rubber while Taeyong hobbles to the bathroom and turns on the running water.

Jaehyun pushes the hair from his forehead and sighs. Then reality catches up.

_I just slept with my boss. Holy shit I just slept-_

Taeyong’s head pokes out from the bathroom. “Hey, where do you keep the towels?”

Jaehyun blinks and slowly recalls. “Bottom drawer of the cabinet to the right of the door.”

Taeyong hums, the sound echoing through the bathroom. “Found it, thanks.”

Jaehyun collapses on his bed, dragging an arm over his eyes and slowly freaking out because what the fuck he just fucked his boss-

“I can see you over-thinking from over here,” comes the resonating comment. Taeyong is still in the bathroom can’t see a thing, the arrogant liar.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Jaehyun shouts back. He’s no better.

“Yeah? Ten bucks that you’re lowkey freaking out about sleeping with your boss-”

“Okay what the fuck, get out of my head.”

He hears a light laughter and scowls under his arm. The tap turns off after a moment, and the right side of his bed sags a bit.

“Jaehyun, look at me?”

After a moment of hesitation, Jaehyun pulls his arm back and turns to meet Taeyong’s soft, empathetic gaze. He also looks so thoroughly fucked and satisfied there’s a glow around him. It’s like he’s asking to be fucked again and Jaehyun’s dick twitches at the idea despite having orgasmed twice already.

“You really need to stop looking so fucking good,” he mutters, inhaling deeply as he squeezes his eyes shut. Only the image is immediately seared into his memory. _Shit, since when was that a thing?_

Taeyong chuckles. “Okay, I’ll work on that while you stop over-thinking.”

“I slept with my boss, forgive me if I’m reacting proportionately to that-”

Taeyong draws back, eyes tender. “If it weirds you out this much, this can just be a one-time thing.” His smile is crooked and all wrong as he leans away. “To my point, I really didn’t think this would happen.”

Jaehyun shakes his head, hand already seeking out Taeyong’s to intertwine their digits. “I just. Um, yeah, I freaked. So much happened in the span of a few hours.” He chews his lips, measuring the words in his head. “I’m sorry.”

Taeyong searches Jaehyun’s eyes, then nods slowly. “Sorry for barging into your personal life like this too. I didn’t think- no, I wasn’t thinking. I thought you’d left me and I didn’t… I didn’t know what to do.”

“I wasn’t thinking either. I just,” Jaehyun takes a deep breath. “Even for someone who works under high stress situations, this is still a lot to take in.”

Taeyong snorts, running a thumb over Jaehyun’s wrist. “I get it. You really don’t like the cameras, huh?”

Jaehyun chews on his lips and nods. “Was it that obvious?”

“To me it was.”

He stills, letting the words hang in the air like a pregnant pause.

“Taeyong, I-”  
“Listen-”

They pause, looking at each other before Taeyong shakes his head, urging Jaehyun to go first with a look in his eyes.

“My feelings for you haven’t changed and won’t change. I don’t regret, I just…”

“Need some time to get used to this?” Taeyong supplies helpfully.

Jaehyun nods. “Yeah.” Taeyong hums, suddenly contemplative, and Jaehyun suddenly grows concerned. “Please don’t tell me I’ll get penalized for this.”

Taeyong chuckles. “Do you want there to be? Because the only punishments I care to give would be served in my office or private quarters.”

Jaehyun freezes, slowly turning his head to meet Taeyong’s mirthful eyes.

“Joking.”

Taeyong bursts out laughing and Jaehyun scrunches his nose, but internally, he’s admiring how lovely Taeyong looks when he lets his guard drop like this. He pulls Taeyong into his arms. Taeyong doesn’t retaliate at all. He makes a soft happy sound from the back of his throat and rolls over on top of Jaehyun and presses their lips together with practiced ease, like they’ve always done this.

Jaehyun instinctively struggles for all of two seconds before giving up, because a kiss is probably one of the lesser incriminating things on the list of Things To Not Do With Your Boss. He however doesn’t ignore how his heart soars when he feels Taeyong pressing emotions into the kiss, because he wants this too, and so damn badly it hurts.

“This is okay, right?” Jaehyun asks hesitantly.

Taeyong intertwines their legs and nods into Jaehyun’s chest. “More than.”

“Let me know if it’s too much.”

“I will, but I think between the two of us, you’re going to have a harder time adjusting.” Taeyong predicts, a small smile playing about his lips as he wraps an arm around Jaehyun’s middle.

“What do you mean?”

“I’m the boss, they can’t touch me.”

He’s of course referring to the team at LTY Co., because Yuta’s downloaded an app on his phone that makes sure he knows Taeyong gets home safely. He probably already shared the news with everyone from LTY Co. minutes after Taeyong’s arrived at Jaehyun’s place.

“That makes no difference to majority of the company, you realize,” Jaehyun mumbles into the tufts of Taeyong’s soft dark brown hair.

Taeyong presses a kiss on Jaehyun’s collar and shivers when Jaehyun makes a lazy, satisfied noise. Jaehyun squints at him. “You have a thing for my voice, don’t you?”

Taeyong stills as his cheeks turn an interesting shade of pink. “What gave it away?”

Jaehyun makes a show of thinking aloud, but the tell-tale smirk on his face reveals that he already knows. “You squeezed down harder when I whispered by your ear-”

Taeyong buries his face in his hands. “OKAY that’s enough, yeah I was-I mean, I am, I have. Okay,” he takes a deep breath. “Objectively, you have a very nice voice.” He says, ignoring the full blush across his face and neck.

Jaehyun smirks. “Right, objectively. You realize that after tonight, it’s going to be hard to keep the personal and private lives separate, right?”

“Well aware,” Taeyong grumbles. “Like you said, it just takes time getting used to.” He dips his head under Jaehyun’s chin and snuggles closer into the embrace. “On a different note, you look really good in casual wear,” he smiles, a hand cupping Jaehyun's ass.

Jaehyun chuckles. “Then make Sweatpants Fridays a thing.”

Taeyong snickers. “Stop making such a compelling argument. The company an image to uphold.”

Jaehyun snorts. “Jisung already wears Adidas sweatpants, says he has dance class to go right after. It's a matter of time before everyone takes it down a notch.”

“Ugh, Jisung again?”

Jaehyun snickers. “Cut the boy some slack.”

Taeyong scoffs. “He's an overgrown quokka. His impudence is going to push him too far one day.”

“Impudence? Not if you keep putting him in place at every turn.”

Taeyong shakes his head. “Someone's gotta do it.”

“Ah, ever the martyr.”

Taeyong levels Jaehyun with a sneer, who bursts out in laughter a moment later. He growls and rolls onto his side facing away from his bed partner. “You're lucky I like you.”

Jaehyun sniffles behind him and wraps an arm around his middle to pull him back into his embrace. “I know, I won't take this for granted.” He presses a kiss on Taeyong's nape and feels the man in his arms shiver slightly. “Who do I have to thank for my parent's skiing trip? Yuta? The office?”

Taeyong clears his throat. “It was Yuta’s idea,” he says stiffly, scratching the side of his arm. “But half of the office were aware of it as well; namely Johnny, Ten, Doyoung and Sicheng. They've pooled in some money, asked my mother to fund the rest on behalf of her son's happiness, and the grocery lucky draw was set up.”

Jaehyun’s eyes narrow when Taeyong trails off ambiguously. There’s probably a catch.

“They’ve also invited themselves to the same hot springs resort because apparently no one made winter holiday plans and Yuta and Sicheng don’t plan to visit their family from their respective countries,” Taeyong rushes, apologetic and embarrassed.

Jaehyun pauses and rolls the idea over his head. It’s not the reaction Taeyong expects.

“Will you be there?” Jaehyun asks eventually.

Taeyong blinks. “It’s a pretty big breach of work and private relationships.”

Jaehyun shrugs. “I suppose. Some of them are mouthy at times, but rarely towards me.” He smiles, playing with Taeyong’s fingers.

Taeyong squeezes his hand. “Is this a good way to introduce your coworkers to your family?”

“Worried they won't like you?”

“Please, I can charm anyone.”

“Yeah you can,” Taeyong looks away because the genuine happiness in Jaehyun's eyes is a bit overwhelming. “Plus, it's not like I'll make Yuta and the others to cancel their booking.”

“But aren't you uncomfortable with this?”

“What gave you that idea?”

Taeyong weighs the words in his head before he speaks. “Not even Sicheng knew about your grandmother's condition, and you were practically inseparable.”

Jaehyun hums, eyes narrowing. “Says you, when you have Yuta.”

The glare Taeyong shoots at Jaehyun is enough to make him gulp audibly. “Not the time to be envious. Had I known about your grandmother I would've scheduled work differently. You could've spent more time with your family.”

Jaehyun looks at Taeyong a little too fondly, shaking his head with a resolute look in his eyes. “And what? Assign the work to other people when everyone's already at full capacity? Hire a new person to split the work? Besides the blatant favouritism, the training would take three months if they're bright, longer if they're slower.”

Taeyong knows this, of course. But it doesn’t stop him from wanting to do more to help Jaehyun.

Jaehyun shakes his head and draws Taeyong even closer, pressing a kiss on the wrinkled forehead. “I'll manage as I have. My grandmother is nothing if not a fighter. She's outlived the predicted nine months by another thirty.”

There's a small pause when Jaehyun takes in his own words, because he too aware of how empty they sound.

_You just never know._

Then Taeyong gets it. Jaehyun is uncomfortable, but he wants Taeyong to meet his grandmother as soon as possible. Whether it’s to formally introduce Taeyong to her or to casually reassure his her that he’s securing and working for his own happiness, the intention and sentiment are clear.

Taeyong ignores the quickened beating of his heart and pulls himself above Jaehyun's eye level to press a chaste kiss on the crown of his head. Jaehyun sighs softly and nuzzles against Taeyong's collar, kissing somewhere above his heart. Taeyong tightens his arms around Jaehyun, carding his fingers through his hair in a comforting manner.

“I've been learning to make peace with this. I have for three years,” Jaehyun admits softly. “I try to keep optimistic, but everyone I’ve talked to tells me to prepare for the worst. It’s like a sword hanging above your head by a thread.”

“It's not easy,” Taeyong agrees softly, voice just above a whisper. “I lost my grandfather a few years ago and it was hell on my father and the rest of our family. It was especially tough because he took care of my sister and I while my parents fought over production costs and advertisement choices. He was practically the social glue that kept us together all these years.”

Jaehyun lets out a shuddering breath and shuts his eyes. “How did you manage that? I can't imagine being, I can't imagine losing-”

Taeyong brushes at Jaehyun’s hair absentmindedly. “There's not one tried and true way of dealing with death. Everyone mourns differently. But you learn to breathe and live after a while.”

The soft words wash over Jaehyun like a tide. He grows silent.

“It's a lot for one night, isn't it?” Taeyong whispers.

“It really is,” Jaehyun replies, tone just as soft.

Taeyong hums. “Will you be going back to your parents’ place?”

“Not without you.”

“Heh, didn’t peg you to be the clingy type.”

“I’ll show you clingy-”

“Oy, that’s not fair-” Taeyong yelps, but he’s already under Jaehyun at this point while the younger man presses deep, languid kisses into their open mouths with a controlled slowness.

Taeyong shudders and moans into the kiss, relaxing his body to take everything in.

Eventually Jaehyun pulls back with a satisfied smile, and spoons Taeyong again. His eyelids droop with tell-tale sleepiness as he nuzzles into Taeyong’s nape, pressing a soft kiss there.

The fatigue that darted to the recesses of Jaehyun’s mind earlier creeps out in slow increments, enveloping his vision in black. The last thing he registers is the warmth of the body in his arms and the soft, even breathing, and he falls asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still with me? Feeling okay? It was a mess? Yeah, yeah it was. Sorry to put you through that, but I hope you found bits of it enjoyable ;) It'll only be uphill from here I promise <3 Also... *narrows eyes* emblasometimes stop predicting the future you're ruining the fun!
> 
> Take care, and tread softly.


	3. it's you

_-A Christmas in the future-_

Jaehyun clicks off his pair of skis at the bottom of the mountain after one last run down the white slopes.

The sky is a beautiful mix of deep purple and midnight blue, and the mountain is illuminated by strong lights projecting kilowatts onto the powdered white. He’s one of the few left on the slope. Earlier, as Taeyong unbuckles the snowboard from his boots, he claims that Jaehyun has made enough runs to last a lifetime. But Jaehyun begs to differ, anticipating the ski trip tradition to continue for as long as he’s healthy.

Taeyong himself had called quits sometime in the afternoon saying _his knees and back would appreciate the gesture_ , all the while shooting Jaehyun a pointed look. Jaehyun snorted and called him old, then got tackled into the pile of snow behind him. Their skis and snowboards went flying it’s a wonder no one got hurt.

Eventually Jaehyun dug himself out with peels of laughter and stuck his arm into the snow to tug Taeyong along. Taeyong rolled his eyes but his lips were already quirking into a wide smile. He placed a peck on Jaehyun’s cheek, patted the snow out of his clothes, and said that he’d meet Jaehyun in their room.

Jaehyun hummed and doubled back to the base where the ski lifts were with the intention to make the most out of his time on the slopes.

It had been three years ago when Jaehyun rediscovered his love for gliding down the sides of mountains at sometimes dangerously fast speeds. Taeyong once noted, with a tone of poorly concealed alarm, that he’d created a monster. Jaehyun’s response was a low chuckle as he hugged him close and whispered that he’d always been a monster… in bed.

Taeyong flushed and shoved the laughing Jaehyun to go running towards Yuta, Johnny and Ten near the ski lifts.

It had been three years ago when Jaehyun left the company Christmas dinner early, mentally and emotionally overwhelmed. Three years when he’d learned, up close and personal, that Taeyong saw him in something other than a professional light (the light had, in fact, been of a sexual tint). Three years since he went on the 4 day, all-inclusive ski trip with his family and half of the company, sliding down slopes while sharing introductions between his grandmother and Johnny, Ten, Yuta and Taeyong.

Three years since his every first with Taeyong, because they didn't stop at one or two that night. He gave as much as he took, exploring and tasting every stretch of skin and crevice, finding all of Taeyong's weaknesses to tear him apart cleanly and thoroughly, only to build him up again for the final release.

And Taeyong was the same with him, being as intense, passionate and meticulous as his reputation preceded him. Jaehyun quelled the jealousy that soared from moment to moment, but Taeyong noticed his distraction and took him even more roughly, wholly until he is crying and begging for release; it was a whole mess.

It was towards late afternoon the next day (which, thankfully, was a Sunday) when Jaehyun dropped Taeyong off before rounding back home to his parents and grandmother. His mother called exactly once the night before, left a message, and he texted to let her know he wouldn’t be going home that evening.

It could mean a lot of things, but since all mothers have the seventh sense, one look at him and she sauntered over to his father, who handed a fifty thousand won bill in dejection, and waves teasingly at her son. Damn parents.

His grandmother greeted him when he entered the living room. She was bundled under a coarse layer of blanket, the television blaring a hilarious variety show on one side and heater on the other. She’d never looked so small.

Jaehyun took off his jacket and huddled with her on the couch, digging his hand under the blankets so they could link arms, and watched the latest episode of Happy Together until it was time for dinner. She chuckled and petted his hand, then complained at the man on television for arguing that those who were not married should not live together, much less have children. She tugged at Jaehyun’s arms, eyes still glued to the colourful screen, and muttered, “These idiots spew the dumbest things on national television, how backwards are they? I could replace them and be a whole sensation myself!”

She cackled loudly, then coughed and took the cup of tea Jaehyun offered with thankful, watery eyes.

“I’m sure you could, grandma,” Jaehyun encouraged with a wide grin, taking the cup when she was done with it.

She hummed with a crooked smile.

It didn’t take Jaehyun long to figure out what she implied; he had the same thing in mind when he asked whether Taeyong would be going to the ski trip. He wanted to introduce his grandmother to the person he wanted spend the rest of his life with. He’d employed the most persuasive tactics he knew, from whining to pouting to finally, the puppy eyes, and Taeyong groaned and replied yes, he’d go.

(Not that it would’ve taken that much persuasion if Taeyong were to be very honest, he just wanted to see how far Jaehyun would take his cute displays of affection before Taeyong himself couldn’t handle it anymore.)

When everyone got at the resort, his grandmother gave every one of his coworkers the squinty-eyed judgy look, then Taeyong a glaringly obvious once over, and told Jaehyun she liked him most. Jaehyun turned into the brightest tomato in seconds, Johnny and Ten were guffawing till they ran out of breath, and Yuta complained loudly that between Taeyong and himself he was clearly more handsome.

He whisked the older woman away, taking out his phone to make her do a thorough Buzzfeed quiz to figure out what her type was, starting with “Jong Suk vs. Won Bin”.

Jaehyun and Taeyong were about to follow, but Ten dragged Taeyong away with a whine and a look of longing at the ski hills, and Johnny swung a long arm around Jaehyun’s shoulder and guided him along as well.

Hours later, when they were tired and sore from many runs down the ski hills, they found Yuta sharing funny anecdotes and shots of soju with Jaehyun’s grandmother and parents and a man Jaehyun didn't recognize.

Johnny and Ten quickly bounded over to the group where Johnny greeted the group with casual hellos, and then a firm bro shake with the new man. That was when Jaehyun learned about Yuta’s other half, Hansol.

Jaehyun was understandably slack-jawed but recovered quickly as he greeted the man, quickly learning that he was supposed to be the last founding member of LTY Co. trio along with Taeyong and Yuta. Taeyong had been bitter, Yuta annoyed, which later grew into hesitant support, then somehow, genuine admiration.

Hansol started his own company a year after Taeyong, one that made mobile-compatible ads and banners. He had his own challenges, but between Yuta's financial pointers and Taeyong's I-act-like-I-don't-care-but-I-really-do business advice, his company saw a lot more green than red.

Yuta appointed himself as the acting CFO until someone better came along, but no one was better than Yuta in knowing how Hansol worked, which was why two years into the start-up business, Taeyong posted a new job on the Careers page of their website, to take on responsibilities Yuta haven't the capacity to fulfill, and Jaehyun was hired.

Long story short, if it weren't for Hansol, Jaehyun and Taeyong would’ve never met.

So, back to the present.

Jaehyun returns the skiing gear with a bounce to his steps, it's been a whole year since these hills, and he was making the most out of it.

Taeyong tried to convince him to go elsewhere- Vancouver's Whistler perhaps, for a change of scenery, but he was against it, arguing the consequent jet lag would take time away from enjoying the snowy mountains and more importantly, to himself, that because it held less emotional value to what he was going to do.

He’d been planning this for months. From consulting his parents, to asking Taeyong’s parents for their blessing, to planning the event behind Taeyong’s back, to finding the right ring… It was tough to round all of Taeyong’s friends to join the “surprise” party, they had work after all, but it’d be worth it.

•••

Taeyong moves quickly.

He knows Jaehyun would take his time on the slopes, but hours away when his right hand man, close friend, and partner _might_ (based on the 0.0139% chance that Jaehyun would say no, he calculated), _might_ become his one and only, for the rest of their lives.

Like everything else, he painstakingly checks everything over twice. Calls the kitchen to confirm the menu will be served in accordance to a specific timing, decorates the room with soft candles and flower petals because Jaehyun is a hopeless romantic that way, and texts everyone so that when he proposes, their closest friends will be there to celebrate with them.

•••

Mark almost ruined everything when he got the call from Taeyong days after talking with Jaehyun about the engagement surprise. Donghyuck jumped to the rescue however, pushing the stuttering boy who cannot lie to save his life out of the picture so he could deal with this in a more strategic manner.

“Yes, hyung, I’ll clear my calendar!”  
“-no, of course not. I’m so happy for you!”  
“-sounds good. Keep me updated with the details!”  
“Congrats again, hyung! All the best!”

When he hung up with Taeyong, he and Mark shared wide-eyed glances to take in the information, and he immediately called Doyoung, Sicheng, Johnny and Yuta on all of his speed dials.

•••

Needless to say, it’s a mess.

Dinner is underway when something behind the counter breaks, and both Jaehyun and Taeyong look over to see a bunch of “workers” suspiciously turning their heads and bodies to “clean up the broken glass”. The suspicion rises further when Taeyong hears a hushed, “Mark-hyung! Go back to the kitchen!”

He facepalms, because this wasn’t a part of _his_ plan. At all. They were supposed to come after dessert-

Jaehyun places his hand on the table and gestures for Taeyong to put his hand in his. The latter does so reluctantly, shooting a cautionary glance at the kitchen once more before turning his attention back to Jaehyun.

“What’s up? Didn’t like the meal?”

The meal was a traditional Korean meal, filled with marinated mountain vegetable side dishes, galbi jjim, stone pot cooked rice, hearty soup and the sweetest makgeolli. They were all of his and Taeyong’s favourites.

Taeyong shakes his head. “Of course not, I made sure these were our favourite-”

Jaehyun grins, brushing a thumb across knuckles. “And it's delicious, and I'm about to ruin the surprise both you and I put together, if the idiots behind the counter don't do it first-”

Taeyong pauses, mind working a mile a minute.

“How did you know?”

“Caught Ten humming the Imperial March down the hall this morning when I went to get coffee. They got here earlier than expected, so I talked to him about it. He mentioned something that was definitely not a part of _my_ plan, so I figured something else was going on. Then when you left me on the ski hills, you had a distracted, constipated look on your face-”

Taeyong bristles. "Hey now-”

“I love you.” Jaehyun interjects.

“I love you.” Taeyong replies automatically, then eyes hesitantly at their connected hands before up at Jaehyun's twinkling eyes.

He's never looked more handsome, more in love, happier and all at once, Taeyong feels nervous for being on the receiving end of this happiness...

“Then…”

“Yes, Yongie?”

“W-will you, I- damnit I had a whole speech prepared! Now I just- okay, Jaehyun, marry me?”

The crinkling around Jaehyun's eyes double and he nods with the brightest smile ever.

“Yes. Marry me, too.”

“Yes, a million times yes-”

Jaehyun leaps over the table first, pressing a searing kiss on Taeyong's lips as they laugh and laugh, eyes brimming with tears. It's kind of messy when the snot comes into play, and if Taeyong were less in the moment he would complain very loudly. But his emotions are jumbled and the box in his jacket pocket has more weight than he can bear, so he breaks off the kiss to pull it out- and almost knocks Jaehyun out from the frenzy.

Jaehyun, for the most part, chuckles through it and takes out his ring box with less fuss. He stills Taeyong’s excited motions with another soft peck, then slides the ring on Taeyong's left ring finger, and waits patiently as Taeyong's shaky hands slip the ring on his left ring finger.

At this point, the friends from behind the counter snap to their senses and cheers and applause, with Mark and Chenle being the loudest. Yuta and Hansol quickly collect Taeyong for words of congratulations before shoving him along to the rest of the group. Sicheng and Doyoung give Jaehyun a similar treatment. Ten excitedly passes champagne glasses to everyone as the grooms-to-be make the impromptu toasts that they didn’t prepare for, followed by more cheering and kissing.

Finally, Taeyong’s parents welcome Jaehyun into their family with wide smiles and swelling hearts that seem seconds away from exploding with excitement. Jaehyun’s parents also welcome Taeyong into their family with warm smiles and tight hugs and red around the rims of their eyes because they’re so happy for them.

When Jaehyun turns away from his parents, his smile falters. Taeyong catches the look in his eyes and immediately link their fingers together, squeezing the digits between his for strength and support.

Loss of a loved one was never easy to overcome.

After a moment of pause, Jaehyun smiles again, and if it’s a little wobbly, no one questions it. Taeyong leads him into a few pictures, everyone gets desserts, and the consequent party comes and goes like a blur.

 

In retrospect, it’s probably the only plan they've made that has spun way the hell out of control, but in the best way possible.

Taeyong has never smiled this much in his life. Even his mother casually comments, “I've never seen someone this happy to get married before.”

(Jaehyun was within earshot and figuratively patted himself on the back for a job well done. Johnny, who was with Jaehyun, literally slaps his back so hard he goes flying. He immediately apologizes, claiming the excitement is to be blamed, but Jaehyun is too happy to care.)

That evening, Taeyong and Jaehyun clutch onto each other tightly, whispering fierce promises of working through issues together, to always communicate, and to push and grow and be happy individually and together. They seal it with a kiss and Jaehyun comes into Taeyong, who follows moments after. The engagement rings twinkle on their left ring fingers as they fall asleep with overwhelming happiness and love pounding in their ears and hearts.

 

Days later, when the hype has come and gone, Taeyong slides down face first into his couch as he enters their apartment and sighs of relief. Jaehyun chuckles as he carries the last of their winter gear and luggage from the car. He can do at least that much, he wasn't the one driving for 3 hours back from the ski hills, after all.

“Thanks for driving, love.” He presses a kiss on Taeyong's butt (because reaching his face is a bit challenging to reach from this position) and almost gets kicked in the face from Taeyong's reflex.

Jaehyun yelps. “Dude, don't blind me before we get married, I gotta see you as we consummate this marriage.”

Taeyong slides all the way down the couch and sits back up in a second. He throws a heated glare at Jaehyun and sneers. “Consum-? Seriously, we've had sex eight hundred seventy two times-”

Jaehyun blinks. “Did you seriously keep count-”

“Made it up. Sounds believable though, no?”

“Ridiculous.”

“You said yes to this ridiculousness for the rest of your life.”

“Haha, so did you.”

“...”

They take a pause, a moment to reflect and breathe and just be. While the fanfare lasted just days, they each took months to prepare. The energy and emotions and natural build up has both of them in a sort of daze. Eventually, Taeyong breaks the silence.

“This is crazy. I love you so much and this is crazy.”

Jaehyun inhales deeply and nods, “I agree.”

He slides onto the couch behind Taeyong and pulls the man back so that he is caged between his legs. Taeyong makes a sound, like he doesn't know how… or what.

“Oy I'm having a moment here-”

“Shh.”

“Dont hush me.”

Jaehyun pulls his arms tighter around Taeyong and just breathes. “Just let me hold you, otherwise I think I might get blown away might the fact that I'm marrying the hottest bachelor in the country, according to GQ Korea and Bazaar and-”

Taeyong reaches for his hands and gives them a squeeze just shy of pain. “Oh my god would you give that a rest?”

Jaehyun shakes his head like a petulant kid. “Never. I'm going to remind myself every day of how amazing you are, starting off with all the impressive stats like how long your dick is-”

“Jae!”

“And how many magazine covers you've decorated-”

“Decorated? Way to objectify me-”

“And I'm forever thankful to you and everyone in our lives, for this moment, for every moment before and every moment after. I'm so lucky to have you in my life.”

“Oh babe, so am I.”

There’s a pause in conversation when Jaehyun tries to keep a straight face and Taeyong narrows his eyes as he turns to him with a _look._ “That was your proposal speech, wasn't it?”

Jaehyun looks nonchalant. “What gave it away?”

“You were too eager with the delivery. Also I know you like the back of my hand, so there’s that.”

Jaehyun smirks, dimples and all. “Can't let anything slip past you, can I?”

“Of course not, I'm a genius.” Taeyong retorts, biting back a smile. And tears. The moment is very emotionally complex.

Jaehyun finds the whole reaction adorable and turns himself slightly so he can reach to brush the tears that are collecting at the corners of Taeyong's eyes. “And a cute crybaby. Stop crying you're supposed to be happy!”

Taeyong bristles and smacks his hands away only to draw a gentle half-circle under Jaehyun’s eyes. “You're one to say, look who's crying!”

Jaehyun shakes his head and insists, “It's sweat, it's sweat,” but Taeyong scrunches his nose and pulls him in for a series of long, messy kisses complete with salty tears and awkward tongues.

When Jaehyun stops crying (which he will never admit to), Taeyong pulls away with a gentle smile and asks, “Want to hear mine?”

Jaehyun nods, not-so-subtly wiping his tears and snot off, and Taeyong grins.

“‘There are some tough lessons in life like time is precious, people change, and some things will only happen once then never again. But between them are small breaths of comfort like a day is a day, and love is love. And this love? It belongs to you.’ Then, I’ll finish off with the, ‘Will you marry me?' bit.”

Jaehyun wrinkles his nose as more tears stream down his face. “It’s sweet, but lame,” he hiccups.

Taeyong laughs. “Oh shut up you.”

He pulls Jaehyun in for another round of messy kisses and Jaehyun’s retort gets lost somewhere in between as _other_ ideas stroll in their heads because honestly, some words are unnecessary when they already have each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Jaeyong day <3
> 
> Merry Christmas to those who celebrate, and Happy Holidays to those who don’t :) If your country is cold, stay warm and take care. If your country is tropical, please teleport me there <3
> 
> PS: Props to all those who got the MGS reference.


End file.
